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What Are You Thinking?

Yay I can now put the pool up!
+Ever had a moment where you go onto the forum and try to find your footing because WAIT, this isn't right, and then you're utterly lost for a whole second before you realise you clicked the wrong board? Yikes ._.

++PARTY PARTY PARTY PARTY ON PARTY ON PARTY ON PARTY ON...

+++Hmm.:shifty:
 

all we need to do now is line the all the streets and sidewalks with copper. not onyl will we have hover boards, but maybe we could have hovercars and other technology that can be suspended in the air via magnetism...that seems like the answers to all life's mysteries. magnetism. that and gravity...not the movie, but the actual field of gravity
 
I am thinking about many things. The peeps that know me here, know that I am incredibly scatter brained. The main things in the front of my mind are: My Star Wars story, the slight rewrite of Crystal Caves, and what I am going to do tomorrow. And what I am going to do tomorrow is dye my hair, and write fanfiction, LOL. (If you are curious what color I am dying my hair PM me.)
 
Today is the big day for me! Today is my first of four test I have to pass to get my ged and go on to higher education! :D I am so happy amd nervous. But, I gotta do my best. Whis me luch! X3

Also started my DMC fanfiction in script format. It feel weird writing that way again. Lol Must be a good since that means I feel a lot more
comfortable writing in a more structured way. But, I'll be posting it on here for the lawls and to be free of my random urges I've getting lately. lol :3
 
Mother Nature, you are hysterical; it has literally just gone from sun, to blowing snow, back to sun, and then near-blizzarding. (Which technically isn't a word, but f*ck it...it is, now).

Eep...I haven't even started my word count, today (reading through my last chapter to help me get in the mood for the next one...which means I've been editing as I go).
 
I've basically decided to go the screw it route and fully embrace my paladin/pole-dancer persona. Because why not? It could be fun. I mean, I'm a white dragon cursed by a witch to have a huge, feminine ass. Sounds like the makings of a good anime right there.

God I am so tired and these sleep pills are making me loopy even when I wake up...
 
How can you tell if you're of the wrong gender or just leaning more towards stuff that society said only the opposite gender should like?
I don't know what having a penis is like, so I can't tell if I'd like having one, but boobs and wide hips are free to go anytime.
I like the type of clothing that is more comfortable and functional, finding the stuff in men's section to suit my taste better, even when it comes to colors. Typical female behavior tends to irritate me. Squealing in my presence might earn you a growl and evil eye. Make-up... I understand some basics after forced practice, but I only ever put it for important events, and even then tend to stick to lipstick only. I wouldn't have so much problem with my almost 5 o'clock shade if my mother didn't constantly nag about it.
I sometimes adopt male way of talking. However I do have problems adopting their love for sports. Maybe cause most of them here tend to be rather boring, I've seen a video of a fighting match from Thailand I think, that one interested me more. I also like to watch rally when I stumble on it.

How do you figure yourself out?
 
Sunny said:
How can you tell if you're of the wrong gender or just leaning more towards stuff that society said only the opposite gender should like?
I don't know what having a penis is like, so I can't tell if I'd like having one, but boobs and wide hips are free to go anytime.
I like the type of clothing that is more comfortable and functional, finding the stuff in men's section to suit my taste better, even when it comes to colors. Typical female behavior tends to irritate me. Squealing in my presence might earn you a growl and evil eye. Make-up... I understand some basics after forced practice, but I only ever put it for important events, and even then tend to stick to lipstick only. I wouldn't have so much problem with my almost 5 o'clock shade if my mother didn't constantly nag about it.
I sometimes adopt male way of talking. However I do have problems adopting their love for sports. Maybe cause most of them here tend to be rather boring, I've seen a video of a fighting match from Thailand I think, that one interested me more. I also like to watch rally when I stumble on it.

How do you figure yourself out?
Click to expand...
How you figure yourself out is entirely still up to you. You have to seriously think about it and consider what makes you, you. What makes you comfortable and how you think things should be, because deep down, it's a real identity. You have to be committed.

However, you have to also consider how personal interest does not really reflect a gender identity that much because they are also just sometimes simply interest.

I'm a guy, however I do have an appreciation for feminine beauty. Enough where I sometimes enjoy crossplaying characters, and I'm actually pretty good at it lol. I can totally pull off a rather cute and convincing girl. @Rebel Dynasty can vouch for that ^^.

But even though I do put a lot of effort in to these crossdressing endeavors, I'm still just a guy. I don't see myself wanting to make some life changing transition because it's just not who I am. I'm just your cosplay loving guy that simply enjoys looking pretty every now and then as well. It's a hobby. Sure I may be a little more feminine than most guys because of this stuff, but I still am a dude who likes being one. My girlfriend really loves how I can kinda be the best of both worlds for her lol.

I mean, sure when I figured out how I enjoyed this kind of stuff, I did question things. People in my family could also be rather old fashioned sometimes and aside from all the other problems growing up, I was also given grief because I never really lived up to their ideal vision of a man, which also really had me doubting stuff. But all in all, I don't think I ever could change like that.

Like I said, you gotta be committed and really serious about it. Gender identity isn't some passing thought. I have a friend who is a transwoman. She always knew deep down she was a girl. She went to great lengths to understand and settle on her true gender. I won't get too much in to her story here, but I've talked to her a lot about it.

It's all so complicated though. I know you don't know me that well, but I have experience with this kind of stuff and know people who go through exactly what you may be going through now. Feel free to hit me up if you'd like to chat. I'll listen. :thumbsup:
 
Sunny said:
How do you figure yourself out?
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Chancey289 said:
snip
Click to expand...
I have an idea where you're coming from Sunny. I've always been more attracted to the company of boys when I was a kid (and then puberty hit and **** went crazy and I decided boys had to calm the f down and stop expecting me to dress up for them just because I'm a girl), and my time spent with girl friends throughout high school just taught me how much I'm NOT like the average, makeup loving, platform wearing, soft-spoken eye-lash batting girl (this after I was given 'a wardrobe make-over' by my friend who the boys flaunted over). I'll wash my face, brush my teeth and comb my hair, and would rather invite the neighbourhood boys over to play video games, do waterbomb contests in our pool and have go-kart races down the street, than sit in my friends' room listening to Spice Girls and yapping about one or the other 'cute' boy at school.
I do like to dress-up from time to time, but things like doing my nails? Yah nah. They don't last long (they either crack, peel, or in the case of fake nails, break off) because it's not my kinda lifestyle. I'm too rough with my hands. And when I do the whole soft floaty kind of dresses or skirts, it's usually a phase that lasts for maybe a week and then I'm over it.
I like Harley Davidsons more than perfumes and the latest fashion design trends. I hate jewelry and would rather be given something sweet to add to my car. I have an eye for beauty - if a guy is hot, I'm going to say as much, if he's not, well I'd rather just shut up about it, the same with women. If a woman is legitimately beautiful, I'd say as much. If not, well I'll only rag on her if hubby is checking her out. Like, no. Get better taste, twit. My childhood bff was lesbian, and before she came out about it, we had been attracted to the same kind of guys - honestly it was like we were of one mind. I still believe she was my soulmate, and my best friend now is as much a tomboy as I am.
And I like talking :poop:. Apparently this used to grate my girl friends to no end. I'd be chided for being annoying or trying to have inappropriate conversations that go nowhere. Completely acceptable in the company of the guys but lo and behold when I try to be myself around the girls.
This may have a lot to do with my home environment as I have two brothers, but I also have a lot of aunties and female cousins. It's like I kept telling my lesbo friend: it's NOT genetically encoded into you. Boys don't HAVE to like blue and girls don't HAVE to play with Barbies. It's a CHOICE. I tend to find the less masculine and more 'pretty-boyish' guys incredibly attractive. According to my friend, I'm 'one step away from going gay, just take the plunge'.
But you know yourself. Regardless of beliefs or what society says, in your gut you know yourself, you know what you like and don't like. I like pretty guys, and I like women who take care of themselves. Does that mean I want to date them? No. Does that mean I need to question my sexual preferences? Heck no. Just because society says 'if you're like this, or if you have tendencies toward that, then you are probably like that', doesn't mean you have to believe them.
I'm quite satisfied with my status as a tomboy. Despite loathing all the complexities and agonies of being a female, I'm okay with being a female. It's just in mind, I'm more into the things that guys are into. So no, I don't kid when I say I sometimes feel like a dude trapped in a girls body.

Because seriously. What kind of dude would complain about that. ;)

I guess for some people it's trial and error to discover who they really are. Just don't let society dictate to you who you SHOULD be.

+Chancey I can totally vouch for you, too :)
 
:nailbiting:
Dante's Stalker said:
Trying to come up with a phrase or sumthin' for my sig.
I keep thinking to quote The Rock for some reason.
And Dante's smokin' hot.
So I came up with:
Can you smell what Dante's smokin'?
......yeeeeeeaaaah nah *backs away from brain*
:laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh:

I'm. So. Bored.
I should be writing. But I'm bored.
I want to post but EVERYONE'S GONE.
Maybe I should go to bed.
BUT I'M TOO EXCITED!
*prods belly* Don't let me down tomorrow, 'kay? No fun and games. Mama needs to know whatcha are.
Click to expand...


I just pictured Dante walking down the walkway holding the WWE belt. Giving people the People's Eyebrow.
Fu@kin' epic!! :thumbsup:

I wonder how my life would be if a magical monkey lived with me? :cautious: Wukong don't touch that! Oh hell! :poop:
 
@Sunny

@Dante's Stalker

I hear you both; I still prefer function over form when it comes to clothing, too. Don't get me wrong, I do like some of the "pretty things"...but I noticed the things I find pretty tend to be outside of the norm--think like anime style clothing, and it'll give you a bit of an idea. Long coats that taper at the waist, old fashioned, knee-high boots, corsets, fedoras, trench coats, gloves...(wow...all of this is going to come through so loud and clear in WoN; I can just tell).

Some of which I'd love to get away with, if society would kindly f*ck off. Alas, even without all of these things, I'm still something of an outcast--which in and of itself doesn't bother me too much, except it gets kinda isolating. No one out here (hell, not even where I came from) really seems to click with me on the types of things I enjoy. With my friends, at least there were videogames. Out here, though? No one really seems to share any of my interests, and I don't give two-sh*ts about their calorie-counting, gossip-mongering, or, "I'm popping out my sixth baby, you should have more, too!" pressure tactics. I'm not even joking; some of them get a funny look on their faces when they see I only have the one kid, and have no intentions on having more (not that it can be done, anyway). Like crap...I'm sorry that I somehow insulted you by deciding I personally can't and won't go through it again. Sh*t experiences will do that to you. :/

Funny how things change; I've been given sh*t for being a tomboy, and from the opposite spectrum, I've been accused of being a partying whore--I think back when I first went blonde bangs a couple of years ago, and then blue more recently.

I think the moral of the story is, people will have misconceptions of you, no matter how you look--I'm still a tomboy, underneath it all; I just like my eyeliner a little too much. Still, you won't catch me uploading seventy selfies of myself just to get a bunch of likes and compliments. Bad as my self-esteem can get at times, I'm not that desperate. ;)
 
What do you do when you have a friend who tells you he's not worth saving? That you have to let him go? That he might hurt you? All these emotions... Pure shock. Anger. Sorrow. I don't know what to do. I have done all I can, and nothing works... He tells me I am wasting my time on him...
 
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