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What are you doing?Either at home,work or somewhere.

V

Oldschool DMC fan
Being stalked by my real father again it seems.

We don't talk, not for many years... I have told him before to leave me alone but he insists on tracking me down and finding ways to 'wish me well'. This time through eBay as it is my birthday, last time though sending letters to the village I live in but without a proper address on them. When I reply to him on eBay that it makes me uncomfortable, he tells me to grow up, because it is 'his right' to do this. -__-

Sounds more like he is doing it because he knows I don't want him to, not because he cares. And that he needs to do the growing up, not me...
 

Shadow

the horror was for love
Premium
Being stalked by my real father again it seems.

We don't talk, not for many years... I have told him before to leave me alone but he insists on tracking me down and finding ways to 'wish me well'. This time through eBay as it is my birthday, last time though sending letters to the village I live in but without a proper address on them. When I reply to him on eBay that it makes me uncomfortable, he tells me to grow up, because it is 'his right' to do this. -__-

Sounds more like he is doing it because he knows I don't want him to, not because he cares. And that he needs to do the growing up, not me...

That's creepy of him. :S *is paranoid of that happening with her step-father* I hope he stops.
 

V

Oldschool DMC fan
That's creepy of him. :S *is paranoid of that happening with her step-father* I hope he stops.

It is kinda -___-

I hope you don't have the same thing happen.

Sort of ruined my day to be told "I need to grow up and if I don't like it, I have problems."
 

Shadow

the horror was for love
Premium
It is kinda -___-

I hope you don't have the same thing happen.

Sort of ruined my day to be told "I need to grow up and if I don't like it, I have problems."

:S Thanks, I hope not too.
:/ I'm sorry, hun. That's awful of him to say.
 
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V

Oldschool DMC fan
:S Thanks, I hope not too.
:/ I'm sorry, hun. That's awful of him to say.

Thanks :) I wish I knew how to handle this kind of situation better. If someone is being like that I usually just try to ignore/walk away. With someone who wants to impose their 'right' to be a part of your life though, it's hard not to get angry. I wouldn't have a problem with him at all if he could just be respectful to me. But I'm sure strangers in the street get treated with more respect than I do by my father, and that's really difficult for me to accept because he never wanted me as a baby, he basically dumped me on my mother's door to go and start a new life with another woman. I can't accept he's sincere about any of this deep down, especially when it takes two seconds for him to start insulting me whenever we talk.

I don't think as an adult, your parent should have the right to be a part of your life if you don't agree, do you?
 

Shadow

the horror was for love
Premium
Thanks :) I wish I knew how to handle this kind of situation better. If someone is being like that I usually just try to ignore/walk away. With someone who wants to impose their 'right' to be a part of your life though, it's hard not to get angry. I wouldn't have a problem with him at all if he could just be respectful to me. But I'm sure strangers in the street get treated with more respect than I do by my father, and that's really difficult for me to accept because he never wanted me as a baby, he basically dumped me on my mother's door to go and start a new life with another woman. I can't accept he's sincere about any of this deep down, especially when it takes two seconds for him to start insulting me whenever we talk.

I don't think as an adult, your parent should have the right to be a part of your life if you don't agree, do you?

I agree. >_< Tbh, I dunno just how to deal with it otherwise. :S People like that seem to be pretty annoyingly stubborn. >_< They don't seem to realize just how unwanted their attentions are and how cruel they are. >_<
 
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Angel

Is not rat, is hamster
Admin
Moderator
Sort of ruined my day to be told "I need to grow up and if I don't like it, I have problems."
Ooh, I have a dad like that. It's fun, isn't it? :|

My 14th birthday, he sent me a letter out of the blue telling me I was a disgrace and he basically wanted nothing more to do with me. He's never apologised for it either...he's not that sort of person, apparently. I don't see him as a father anyway - he's someone I work for and I respect him but he's not someone I'd go to if I had a problem or was in trouble. Makes me work all the more harder with my relationship with my own kids, so in a weird way he's done me a favour I guess.

I am currently listening to a song we'll be practicing tonight. And I've heard it a bajillion times now so I'm bored of it already :p
 

V

Oldschool DMC fan
Ooh, I have a dad like that. It's fun, isn't it? :|

My 14th birthday, he sent me a letter out of the blue telling me I was a disgrace and he basically wanted nothing more to do with me. He's never apologised for it either...he's not that sort of person, apparently. I don't see him as a father anyway - he's someone I work for and I respect him but he's not someone I'd go to if I had a problem or was in trouble. Makes me work all the more harder with my relationship with my own kids, so in a weird way he's done me a favour I guess.

I am currently listening to a song we'll be practicing tonight. And I've heard it a bajillion times now so I'm bored of it already :p
You work for him? As in he employs you...?

It sounds like it would be uber awkward if you had to work with him...

Him sending you a letter sort of sounds like he didn't have the guts to say it to your face, and didn't want a reply. But at that age!! :( At least you sort of know where you stand there though. With my real father I feel as though he doesn't actually care about me or my feelings, he just wants to impose himself on me, but he will pretend that he cares. Emotional manipulation - he loves it. He doesn't have any other cards to play now other than something like this that might make me uncomfortable or upset for a short while, since I've basically forgotten about him being a part of my life and I don't really 'need' him. I would like to have a normal relationship with him, but it's just not worth the migraine.
 

Dante's Stalker

"Outrun this!"
Premium
Supporter 2014
Doing the laundry, ironing, recharging the camera battery so I can download the photos onto my PC, sorting out my brochures and about to go through my orders and arrange delivery dates and times with my customers. Also about to put up the new net curtains, and planning on taking off the rest of the flimsy curtain rail in C's room.
 

Shadow

the horror was for love
Premium
Currently eating and plotting story ideas. Soon to be writing reviews, PMs, recipes, and other various messages I've promised people. I need to post this new chapter soon. When can I sleep? x_x
 

Angel

Is not rat, is hamster
Admin
Moderator
You work for him? As in he employs you...?

It sounds like it would be uber awkward if you had to work with him...

Him sending you a letter sort of sounds like he didn't have the guts to say it to your face, and didn't want a reply. But at that age!! :( At least you sort of know where you stand there though. With my real father I feel as though he doesn't actually care about me or my feelings, he just wants to impose himself on me, but he will pretend that he cares. Emotional manipulation - he loves it. He doesn't have any other cards to play now other than something like this that might make me uncomfortable or upset for a short while, since I've basically forgotten about him being a part of my life and I don't really 'need' him. I would like to have a normal relationship with him, but it's just not worth the migraine.
Yah, he runs the charity I work for, but I only have to legally do a face-to-face once a year for the records. We get along ok now - mostly just banter, no real conversation - and he's mellowed some since my boys were born because he always wanted sons and got daughters instead...but I find it kind of hard to let go of things like my sister (2 years older than me) sitting in a pub with me and dad when I was 15 and stating she's dad's favourite and he just nods in agreement. And I'm right there. Stupid stuff like not being allowed to take part in conversations those two have or walking slightly behind them both so I don't bother them. It's little but grinds you down eventually...

And my dad doesn't do confrontation, hence the letter. I didn't talk to him for a year after that and it took a long time for me to pick up the phone or write. But surprise, surprise, I did it first, not him. There have been times he's definitely been there for me and I think most of that stems from guilt. But we're both still alive so you never know - we might recover some semblance of the relationship we ought to have had. I dunno, really...

Weather is mental. I do not get it. At all. So I'm currently trying to figure out if I go out today and what to wear. Yesterday I was caught in a blizzard without a coat and today it's teasing me with blue skies. Hmm...
 
Cooling myself off with a fan I made out of paper. It's 35 degrees and it's nearly 7pm. I hate the heat, the sun can go screw itself too. Evil thing. Out to give me sunburn and ruin my day.

I think I'll work on my cover letter to take my mind of the heat.
 
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