Things DMC Charcters Would Never Say

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well i never knew that :P just shows how much i know about DMC :lol:

D: *wearing apron and holding one of those fluffy duster thingys* Alright then sweethearts, I cleaned your rooms and I baked COOKIES!!!
A bunch of kids: YAY!!!!
V: *just walks in* yo bro i got me a girlfriend *falls on sofa*
D: VERGIL!!!!!!! i just cleaned that.......ewwww you smell weird.....
V: its called 'going out for a drink'
D: oh.........Well who is this girlfriend of yours?
V: *burps* keep your big fat nose out of it *stands up* You gotta problem with that?? huh??? *pushes dante*
D:*starts crying* WAAAA!! VERG YOU BULLY, IM TELLING MUMMY YOU PUSHED ME!! *runs off*
v:........Bast*rd.......*goes for some more beer*
 
Jester: Its time for bed Mary. You can visit your dear mother.
L: In heaven or hell?
Director: Call it lunch break people!
V: Its time for the clown to bow out Arkham.
D: Dude! The shows over!
L: Hey! I was supposed to say try me!
D: (Dante thinks whatever)
Jester/A: Can we eat now? I really need a bagle!
L: Hmmmm, with cheese!
D: And butter with cos lettuce!
L: Hmmmmmm your good!
D: I know. I always wanted to become a chef but my dad said I must become a demon-slayer instaed. Its a sad story...
V: He didnt say you must become one he just said that chef stuff are for sissies!
D: How would you know that mr.know it all?! You were outside playing with your knife the whole time! tHATS WHY YOU CUT POPS FINGER OFF TO!
V: Its a Yamato! And you cant blame me for that! Dad said I should practise from now. You should blame the parents.
L: More like the father!
D:If looks could kill...
V: Yeah. Then I wouldnt fall in the begginning of stage 14 and would be in hell by now!
A: Can we please eat for hells sake!?
D: Feel free!(Points E&I at Arkham)
L: Whatta ya gonna do if you have a job like this?
D: Work it baby! Work it.
V: Isnt that what we always do?
A: I think Im gonna starve to death!
V: Please do!
D: Hey! Then he wont be in the picture anymore!
V: You actually spoke scense for once!
D: Oh yeah!?
(D and V start fighting)
D: In each of us flows his blood! More importanatly, his soul!
V: And I thought I have a bad part...
 
Dalkin;44077 said:
Dante: Maybe I'll give it all up and just stay home and be a house wife. Anyone for a biscuit?

(Vergil and Dante second fight)
Vergil: What did you say?
Dante: I said I'm DIM
Vergil: Dim quite true
Dante: No I'm Doing It Myself

Vergil: I thought that was you singing
Dante: That wasn't me singing. I was being waked on the head by a crazed jester.


ahhh i get it, hes DIM (doing it myself) thats pretty good :lol:
 
D: That damn crazy clown is annoying bro. Ever came across it?
V: Yip. It tried biting me once, but I shoved it away. Mad clown doesnt know what its getting itself into.
L: I heard a rumour about that crazy clown being my papa.
D: I dont blame the rumours.
(Vergil and Dante laugh loudly)
L: (she thinks, "What?")
 
(This is when Vergil falls into the demon world at the end of dmc3.)

*Vergil falls into the underworld as Mundus witnesses.*

Mundus: Well, this is my kinda rain.

(I know that was retarded.)
 
lol but good :P

D: Hey you're gonna pay for that!!
V: Oh yeah? come on then, get me *evil smirk on face*
Vergil and Dante start fighting
L: What the hell are you guys fighting about this time????
D: *starts crying and points at vergil* HE STOLE MY COOKIE!!!!
 
Dante: Boy, does it make my hand hurt stabbing so quickly with my heavy Rebellion sword!

Dante: Hey, boys, check me out as a Pole Dancer!
 
Me too! Have you seen the Tricksterevolution gameplay video? It features things like Dante slashing enemies, running vertically up a wall and then jumping off straight into Pole Play! Awesome stuff :D
 
Kodanshi;44952 said:
Me too! Have you seen the Tricksterevolution gameplay video? It features things like Dante slashing enemies, running vertically up a wall and then jumping off straight into Pole Play! Awesome stuff :D

I haven't seen that. Is there any kind of youtube video of it so I can watch it.
 
L: Why do I always get the stupid parts?!
D: Its like you to say something stupid... right?
V: Why did you have to say that???? Were in big trouble now...
D: You wont wanna hurt me! Ive got Naven! (Performs air rade and shocks lady and Vergil)
D: Okay..... now I AM in BIG TROUBLE! (Dante runs as Vergil and lady chase him)
Arkham: Whats going on in here??....Aaaaaahh!! (Arkham gets shocked too)
D: Please tell me your joking!
(Arkham, lady, and Vergil jump on Dante)
 
Dante: Hey guys did you know there's a big dog in here?

Lady: Can I have a longer skirt?

Vergil: This isn't my weapon
Dante: Hey get your own damn guns.

Arkham: Mary I think I'm dying
Lady: That's not in the script
Arkham: No I think I'm really dying get an ambulance.
Lady: I don't think that's in here either.
Dante: I think he's dead dude.
(Vergil makes a run for it)
 
(dante walks in to devilmaycry afther another finsihed job puts sword down guns up and sits in his chair)
(lady walks in with noting but a bra and jeans on)
d:girl that so dosent go with your eyes
l:i know i was just hot
d:umm no your not
l:i am and your not
d:like i care
l:u do care
d:dont
l:do
d:ok maybe i do (dante starts to think wait if she wears that why shes fighting demons wont they try to do something other then kill her?)

l:hey whats with the funny face
d:i was just think about ur boobz i mean land mines i mean ahhhh i dont know what i mean
(dante walks out side and starts to have dirty thohts again)
 
Dante: What is it with me and hair miorities?
Lady: Huh?
Trish, Lucia and Beryl: oh...
Lady: Hair what?
Trish: Blondes and redheads are not as common as brunettes and ravenhair.
Lady: I still don't get it.
Trish: well at least i'm not the dumb one.
 
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