Ha, don't worry we're all friends here. I thought it was interesting how you brought up the Spider-man reboot, because it's a great comparative example to DmC as a successful reboot. You compared it's change of pace next to the Sam Raimi movies as similar to DmC's difference from Devil May Cry, but actually, Raimi's movie is much closer to DmC. The Peter Parker in his movies is a lot different than the Peter Parker from the comic books, and once Raimi started taking liberties with the source material, hardcore fans similarly started crying foul (Not to say I'm not grateful for those movies, anyone who's read James Cameron's interpretation of the web-slinger on Cracked.com know what I mean). The point is, that since this movie has come out, people have been calling Andrew Garfield, and the direction of the new Spider-Man superior compared to the older series. Why? Because of it's adherence to the original ideas that made the comics great, as well as it's respect of its predecessors in the Raimi Trilogy. It's these traits, or lack thereof, that make me conversely dislike DmC.
You asked "Why critic the game for changing Dante to look more like the original Dante (in facial appearance and personality) when that's what's most of us were angry about him lacking in the first place?" Well, let's first ignore the irony of trying to make your new character more like the one he's replacing and acknowledge that what the game designers have chosen to carry on from the previous game is not a reflection of the adherence I was talking about in the previous paragraph. Just because their character has white hair in his Devil Trigger mode, or has two guns named Ebony and Ivory doesn't mean he is Dante. We don't like Dante just because he trash-talks and doesn't give a sh*t. Although the original Dante made jokes and appeared to be ambivalent to the problems of others, he was shown to express regret, empathy, and conviction when faced with problems like Trish's betrayal, or Lady's unraveling. He professes to the latter, "At first I didn't give a damn, but because of you, I know what's important now." We see that the new personality they've given their character is arrogant and mean, a far cry from both their original reboot trailer as well as the original Devil May Cry Dante, but one they profess is ironically more "Dante-like" to appease the fans. Generalizations like that insult the intelligence of the fans and seems to suggest a rather ignorant viewpoint on what they think makes Dante cool. They've focused more on aesthetics and missed the mark with what made us fall in love with Dante in the first place such as his connection to humanity, which apparently didn't seem very Dante-like to them, so now he's part Angel. So, what we have now is this new Dante, stuck in a Limbo weirdly befitting his game. A man with a different look and a different story, but an attitude which aspires to be more like the Dante we know and love but missing the mark completely. This is the character clash Hyper was talking about. The two don't fit and it feels forced.
The least Ninja Theory can do is tip their collective hat to the original series, but unlike the respect Spider-man obviously has for its predecessors, Tameem and his crew have shown constant disrespect towards the original series in such a manner that it seems like they are, as you put it, trying to "stomp" it out of existence while they ironically need it to establish their new franchise (remember they're making a movie now). A lot of influence from the previous games can be seen, albeit, contrastingly paired with Ninja Theory's new politically charged modem and it just makes them look foolish and unimaginative which is a shame because those moving areas are definitely original and cool. It's like Paul W.S. Anderson's Resident Evil movies. Every original idea he has (c'mon, that quarter-shotgun scene in Afterlife was batsh*t cool) is marred by the fact that everything else is filled with derivative components he's ripped from the Resident Evil games and placed out-of-context in his movies under the banner of "fan service."
Look, I've gone on for a bit, so let me just finish with this thought: Ninja Theory originally wanted to make a game that was the polar opposite of Devil May Cry. I'm sure it could've worked, but their timing could not have been worse. Fans were only partially sated by DMC4 and were drooling for DMC 5 when the reboot was announced. It would have been smarter to conclude the Devil May Cry's storyline before creating a new one, but by doing so, Capcom ensured that the new project would garner harsh criticism. So, instead of continuing to develop a game that could have been entirely separate from Devil May Cry, Ninja Theory was and has been forced to validate itself ever since, and what's the best way of doing that? By bashing the competition, in this case, Devil May Cry.
What could have remained two separate worlds has now been adulterated by Capcom's hurt pride and need for green. Now, they've bet everything on DmC. They've got the game (which hasn't even come out yet), an upcoming movie, and a new character which they and Ninja Theory now feel they need to use to erase our beloved Devil May Cry like it never happened. It's really the fans' fault though. This could have all been avoided. We just wanted Devil May Cry 5 too much.