He only talks to me when he drinks..

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Vergillicious said:
But his feelings have changed quite a lot..and I don't know why..
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I think he just changed his mind without any particular reason. You said he could have any girl he wanted, so maybe he met someone over there that reminded him of his ex. I'm not saying that's what happened, I'm just saying that it could be a valid theory, that's all.

Here. Have a BBT gif to cheer you up.

tumblr_lq38df6wnq1ql9vilo1_500.gif


Never fails to put a smile on my face. ^_^
 
Vergillicious said:
I won't be dragged down, I know when to call it quits and walk away. Thank you for your support.
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You seem an intelligent girl and a guy shouldn't play with your feelings or mind,keep your head up and take care of what you do so you won't get hurt :). Especially as a girl,take care.
Keep a balanced approach to him,be more as a friend,since I see he's quite a trouble with the alcohol.I advice you because I had trouble with such guys too,but I knew when to put and end to it,and when you feel things go down,put an end to it too.
 
MephistoCarnival said:
You seem an intelligent girl and a guy shouldn't play with your feelings or mind,keep your head up and take care of what you do so you won't get hurt :). Especially as a girl,take care.
Keep a balanced approach to him,be more as a friend,since I see he's quite a trouble with the alcohol.I advice you because I had trouble with such guys too,but I knew when to put and end to it,and when you feel things go down,put an end to it too.
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What you mean by balance? Like if he starts to bush me away don't prod him and just give him space, but when he talks to me for comfort just comfort him just be there to listen? Last time he texted me he was drinking and I asked him if he was ok and sad. He just said "no I'm happy" and then I said "dont lie to me..your hurt sweetie" he didn't say anything after that and I just told him that I don't want anything bad to happen to him. That I cared. I hope he didn't take it as me trying to hit on him. I want to make him see that I care and I want to make sure he's ok. That's all and support him nothing more.
 
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Vergillicious said:
What you mean by balance? Like if he starts to bush me away don't prod him and just give him space, but when he talks to me for comfort just comfort him just be there to listen? Last time he texted me he was drinking and I asked him if he was ok and sad. He just said "no I'm happy" and then I said "dont lie to me..your hurt sweetie" he didn't say anything after that and I just told him that I don't want anything bad to happen to him. That I cared. I hope he didn't take it as me trying to hit on him. I want to make him see that I care and I want to make sure he's ok. That's all and support him nothing more.
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By that I mean you may need to keep a certain distance from him,not to get too involved or too close to him more than a good friend. It's good to care for him but don't get him the impression of a real lover.
 
does he realise how much he is messing with your head and your heart ? how do women in relationships take his crap in fairness if he cares for you he should be up front with you on his feelings and if he doesnt feel the same then you can move on easier knowing where you stand i think he is a fool as you seem like a really nice gal :)
 
MephistoCarnival said:
By that I mean you may need to keep a certain distance from him,not to get too involved or too close to him more than a good friend. It's good to care for him but don't get him the impression of a real lover.
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I don't see him as a lover more like part of my family a brother or cousin. I will keep my distance that's the best I can do. He has to many problems that I could not see him as a lover. When I talk to him or see a picture of him my heart doesn't feel anything.
 
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ef9 o shea said:
does he realise how much he is messing with your head and your heart ? how do women in relationships take his crap in fairness if he cares for you he should be up front with you on his feelings and if he doesnt feel the same then you can move on easier knowing where you stand i think he is a fool as you seem like a really nice gal :)
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To be honest I don't think he would care if he knew or not.
 
Vergillicious said:
To be honest I don't think he would care if he knew or not.
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I remember telling him how I felt a long while ago. At one point he accepted it and then at another time he said something about just being as friends. I think that he hates me..or maybe he doesn't want me to get close cause he doesn't want us to get hurt. Or maybe he doesn't know that he's hurting me, it's whatever
 
then he doesnt deserve the love of a good woman treating women like that is wrong here in ireland if he did that to a woman she would smack him in the eye you will find someone and any decent guy will treat you properly and make u happy he sounds more like a teen with add than a 25 year old
 
you hold your head up you have a lot to offer he cant see it so he is either stupid blind or possibly gay
 
ef9 o shea said:
then he doesnt deserve the love of a good woman treating women like that is wrong here in ireland if he did that to a woman she would smack him in the eye you will find someone and any decent guy will treat you properly and make u happy he sounds more like a teen with add than a 25 year old
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I'm not going to lie..but I've done bad things in the past too not as bad but still..I'm just trying to learn from my mistakes that I've made and right now I'm not wanting to be with anyone..so please don't judge him to harshly..I'm not a good woman..I've hurt others too and have been hurt..but that doesn't mean that it's ok..it's inhuman when people do that and I blame myself not him or anyone else...
 
your trying to better yourself though he is acting the same and doesnt care thats the difference we all make mistakes and get hurt i used to be a doormat for women when i was younger i was wild too got into a lot of fights but i grew up and became a man became a mechanic nd settled down and im all the better and happier now its how you move forward with your life for the future and how you act in the present that defines you so at this moment you are a good person the past is behind you so keep the chin up
 
ef9 o shea said:
your trying to better yourself though he is acting the same and doesnt care thats the difference we all make mistakes and get hurt i used to be a doormat for women when i was younger i was wild too got into a lot of fights but i grew up and became a man became a mechanic nd settled down and im all the better and happier now its how you move forward with your life for the future and how you act in the present that defines you so at this moment you are a good person the past is behind you so keep the chin up
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But what really gets me is that he wanted to hear how I felt about him. And so I'd always tell him, there was 1time where he thought about me and him together. And now..I don't know. But like I've said my heart doesn't ache for him. I just miss him a lot I just want to be really good friends. And both of us hanging out like friends do.
 
So this is what my best friend told me..

They are right, it's just like Jonathon and I said.

He cannot be fixed! He is broken and you cannot fix him. He is an emotional leach and professional liar. You are better off moving on and severing all contact with him. Remember, even after you cut the head off a snake it can still bite you. He does not love you and never will. This is all just a game and he is doing this to get attention for himself, it is comfort for him not therapeutic.
 
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Vergillicious said:
So this is what my best friend told me..

They are right, it's just like Jonathon and I said.

He cannot be fixed! He is broken and you cannot fix him. He is an emotional leach and professional liar. You are better off moving on and severing all contact with him. Remember, even after you cut the head off a snake it can still bite you. He does not love you and never will. This is all just a game and he is doing this to get attention for himself, it is comfort for him not therapeutic.
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Like I said. :|

You're better off running as far and as fast as you can away from this person.
 
More stuff my best friend said..

You should change your number again and be done with him and his friends. He's running from the problems he created, no, he was using you from the very beginning. It has always been about him, because there are always people like him. Don't try to look for some reason to hold on to him. He will never be worth a damn, you cannot change him nor can you fix him. Things are different now even if they were nice before. Kindness and compassion cannot change the way the mind works. I wish it could but believe me, it cannot be changed. The mind once damaged cannot be fixed, it's sad but it's the truth. If he chooses to stop drinking that will be because he wants to, but he will still have "AD" attachment disorder along with depression and trust issues. The person who caused the issue is the only one who can help start fixing him. However his "real" mother would be a good start. As long as he wanted to be helped. You will be better off walking away from him.

It sucks to let someone go, but you need to, your love and compassion is wasted on him, it will never do any good for him. He feels that he was never loved and the sad truth is he doesn't know how too love. He cannot learn either, the way "AD" people act is all the same. :(

It is an actual mental disorder caused by mental trauma, the symptoms are all the same.

You are looking for excuses to hold onto him. Everybody has told you the same thing yet you don't like the answer so you keep looking. Just like him, only you can choose to let go. Be careful or you are going to get hurt more and only you will be to blame. I would hate for you to get hurt but the only people that can be helped are the ones that want to be helped. Believe me, this is my job. I work with kids and the parents of the kids. I see this crap everyday and it's always the same.
 
ROCKMAN X said:
Well if you ask me i don't really prefer people who call me when they're drunk.. that's just plain rude.

TBH you're being too lenient and giving him wayyy to much liberty.
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ROCKMAN X said:
Well if you ask me i don't really prefer people who call me when they're drunk.. that's just plain rude.


TBH you're being too lenient and giving him wayyy to much liberty.
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What do you mean being lenient and giving him wayyy to much liberty?
 
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