• Welcome to the Devil May Cry Community Forum!

    We're a group of fans who are passionate about the Devil May Cry series and video gaming.

    Register Log in

Mortal

Nicodemus Zamoran

The Hellslayer Knight
Mortal ~ Chapter 1 by Nicodemus Zamoran and DreadnoughtDT

Main Characters: Nic Henderson aka Nicodemus Zamoran, the Hellslayer Knight reborn; Dylan Thompson aka DT

DT sighed, bored out of his mind. The pencil in his hand refused to take the notes that were being given, considering he never needed to do so anyway. He always remembered enough to pass his tests. He looked at the teacher, still flapping her old gums and yammering on about nothing interesting. DT looked over to Nic and nudged him. "Look at Klayborne's nose." He muttered. "Looks like a freaking hawk. I think we should call her "The Hawk" from now on."

Nic smiled at the joke. He was leaning back in his chair, the hand flying across the page as he copied down the notes without even looking. “Certainly fits her, especially since she also act like one.” He whispered, his lips barely moving. He glanced at DT. “My parents got me a couple brand new motorcycles the other day. Wanna try them out after school?”

DT nodded. "I'm up for that. Sounds like a lot of fun." He thought of it for a few moments. The sun out on a bright day, not a cloud in sight, roaring in a prairie with the wind blowing through his slick black hair... It would be awesome.

The bell rang, cutting off the teacher mid sentence. “Finally.” Nic said as he put his book back into his black bag.

DT got up out of his seat quickly and grabbed his backpack. "Took long enough." He muttered distastefully.

“I wonder when she will remember that homework she gave us two days ago.” Nic whispered conspiratorially to DT as he also got up and started to head for the door.

DT smiled. "Hopefully never. I didn't even start it yet." He said in a tone that seemed to say "I don't really care, actually."

“Remember last time she forgot? Took her a month to remember.” Nic said. They had just exited the room and entered the not so crowded hallway. “Let’s get rid of these bags before we leave.” Nic said as he walked towards his locker. Each locker was painted a different color and assigned to the students. Nic was the only one, however, to have a black one.

DT walked to his locker, conveniently placed right next to Nic's. Admittedly, he was slightly jealous of Nic for having the only black locker in school. It was the thing everyone wanted, if only for the rights to say "I have the black locker". DT was happy with his blue one for the time being, but he couldn't help feeling jealous. "Yeah, she takes forever for that kind of stuff." He said, a laugh in his tone.

“And the only time she remembered that one was because Henry reminded her.” Nic said as he slammed his locker closed. “This time, I don’t think anyone will mention it.”

DT nodded. "Oh, definitely. The last time she was reminded, only two of us had actually finished it because we thought she'd never remember." He rolled his eyes. "The hissy fit she pitched was pretty funny, though."

“And then she gave us double homework for a week, which she never remembered to pick up.” Nic chuckled. He leaned against the locker and looked at DT. “It’s amazing that they haven’t fired her yet.”

DT laughed quietly. "Yeah, I know. Plus she's freaking blind... Remember when she was having trouble figuring out who I was when she forgot her glasses one day?" He chuckled. "Oh, god... I couldn't stop giggling that day."

Nic continued to smile, his eyes a light shade of blue. “Yeah.” He pushed off from the lockers and started down the hall, DT walking beside him. “Let’s go home and try out the motos while we have time.” He said, excitement in his voice.

DT nodded. "Oh, hell to the yeah! I also wanna walk home." He smiled. "Of course, we always do that anyway, so why did I even say it?"

“Just to say it.” Nic said as he pushed open the door and came face to face with Jessica.

Jessica smiled at Nic and then looked at DT, blushing slightly. "Um... Hi DT... I was just wondering if... Um... Uh..." She trailed off, not seeming to know what to say.

DT laughed. "An admirer? Sorry, no autographs." He closed his locker and smiled. "I would love to talk, I really would, but I have a tight schedule. See you around." He turned to Nic and gave him a "let's go" signal.

Nic walked around her. “Maybe next time.” He whispered in her ear as he passed by. The two then started walking into the parking lot. “So, which way do we go today? The generic route, or the backwoods?” Nic asked, already knowing the answer.

DT smiled. "Backwoods, of course. You know I wouldn't have it any other way." He walked slightly faster. "Besides, it's faster... And..." He smiled deviously. "It's the perfect place for a race.”

Nic laughed. “Yeah. We are tied 2-2. Let’s see who can make it to three first.”

DT smiled. "You remember the starting point, right? After there, that's when we run." He rubbed his hand together. "I'm gonna win this time. You know how competitive I am."

Nic pulled out a strange coin. It was old and had strange runes carved into it. “Why don’t we let fate decide this.”

DT thought for a moment. "Y'know what? Fine by me." He smiled and nodded. "I have a feeling fate's on my side."

Nic smiled. “Well then, let’s go.” He pulled his hand back and then threw the coin along the path, hard enough for it to land at the end. He then started running.

DT took off running, his feet hammering hard on the ground. He bent over and slammed his hands on the ground, flipping him over and sending him ahead of Nic by a good distance.

Nic smiled and started to run, only his toes touching the ground, yet propelling him forward. He caught up to DT quickly. They were halfway down the track when three guys walked out of the trees, hoods obscuring their faces.

DT skidded to a stop and looked at the three guys. "Um... Can we help you?" He said, obviously a bit annoyed that these guys interrupted the tiebreaker. Nic stopped as well and looked at them suspiciously, his eyes now a soft grey.

One guy took a step forward. "Yeah, you can." He said, his voice had a hint of anger in it. "First, we're gonna kick your asses. Then we're gonna take your necklace." He pointed at DT's large brass and onyx cross necklace. "Would fetch a pretty penny, I think.”

Nic smiled. “So, Brad, you thought that by bringing your buddies along would help you beat us.“ He glanced at DT. “If you want his necklace, come and get it.”

DT cracked his knuckles. "Boy, this is gonna be fun." He said, smirking deviously.

The guy that Nic had addressed as Brad charged forward with a punch aimed at DT's face while the other two guys ran at Nic. DT crouched down, making Brad miss the punch and trip over DT's prone body. "Gonna have to do better than that!" He said mockingly.

Nic started bouncing lightly on the balls of his feet. “Let’s see if you guys can keep track.” He said. He Faced one of them, his body turned to the side. He jabbed at the guys stomach, making him bend over, then struck his face. As he jerked up again, Nic jumped into the air, spun, and kicked the guy in his solar plexus, knocking him unconscious. As he landed he turned on the other one.

Brad got back up and charged at DT again, obviously not learning his lesson. DT pulled his hand back and with a force rivaling Nic's kick, punched Brad in the temple, knocking him unconscious right away.

The third bully reached into his pocket and pulled out a switchblade. He charged at DT with it, aiming to stab him in the stomach. DT moved out of the way and stomped on his foot, then punched him in the gut hard, making him drop the knife and stumble waywardly in Nic's direction.

As the guy bent over and clutched his gut, Nic kneed him in the face. He jerked up holding his nose and Nic unleashed a barrage of punches to his gut, then grabbed him and slammed him onto the ground.

“Well, that was fun.” Nic said. He picked up the knife and threw it into a tree, the blade sinking all the way to the handle.

DT tugged at the knife, making sure it was stuck. "Oh, he's gonna have a fun time getting that out." He said, laughing a bit. "Nothing like a little bit of ass whooping to round out your day, eh Nic?"

Nic nodded. "Yes, it is always refreshing to teach those guys a lesson." He said as he started to walk down the path. "Wanna grab some pizza while we are riding?"

DT nodded. "Dude, you just read my mind." He said as he walked with Nic. "Y'know, it's days like these that a little relaxation is kinda needed."

Nic laughed. “And by relaxing, you mean breaking someone’s bones. I think I may have broken that guys nose. I wanna know what he comes up with to hide the fact that he got his ass beat.”

DT smiled deviously. "Probably some lame excuse like 'Um, I broke it in football practice' or some dumb crap like that." He picked up a stick that was on the ground and swung it a couple times to judge it's weight. "Have you ever used a sword, Nic?" He asked randomly.

“Only in training. My parents drill me every morning, remember? At least they also give me some awesome things, like the motorcycles.” Nic said as he casually walked beside DT. “You are gonna love ‘em.”

DT smiled. "Oh, I bet I will." He thought for a moment. "I gotta show you my sword sometime. It was a gift from my grandfather, just like my necklace. It's pretty damn awesome." He took a deep breath. "But the motorcycles are pretty close on the awesome scale already." He said with a smirk.

“Just wait until you see them. You haven’t seen any like this before. My parents spent a good amount of money to get these specially made.” Nic said, grinning at the thought of the two bikes.

DT nodded. "Am I gonna faint from the awesomeness?" He asked jokingly. "Cuz I don't want to have to have you do CPR on me."

“I won’t give you CPR. I do what my uncle Steve taught me. FTN” Nic laughed.

DT laughed. "Good to know!" He said in between laughs. "Well, I suppose I'm in good hands then."

Nic smiled. “I won’t let you die, buddy. Promise.” He stopped walking and bent down to pick up the coin that he had thrown. “Look at that, a tie.” He said as he laughed.

DT smiled. "Guess it's 3 to 3 now." He said, moving some of his long hair out of his eyes. "God, I should stop using this anime hairstyle." He said jokingly. "It's just not working for me."

“It defines you. It screams ‘I’m badass and I know it!’” Nic said as they continue walking.

DT brushed another couple wayward hairs out of his face. "You think so? No wonder that girl Jessica likes me so much."

“Yeah. She probably has your picture somewhere. Heck, I think half the girls in school have your picture stashed somewhere.” Nic said, grinning.

DT laughed and nudged Nic. "You're not too bad looking yourself, y'know. Don't be so modest." He grinned. "But you have a point. I mean, I'm dazzling, ain't I?" He said, striking a pose.

Nic laughed. “Look out, ladies. Casanova is on the loose!” He said jokingly.

DT snickered. "Indeed he is. Like a wolf that stalks it's prey." He got down on all fours and snarled. "Watch out, women! I'm on the loose!"

Nic laughed harder. "Down boy. We don't want them getting flees, do we?

DT faked a whimper. "D'aww.... Okay, fine." He huffed and looked away from Nic, then looked back with a grin. "Of course, I have to oblige. I don't want the ladies suffering endless nights, scratching their scalps off." He said with a laugh in his tone, getting up again.
 

Nicodemus Zamoran

The Hellslayer Knight
The path ended as they walked onto the sidewalk. “Almost there. Come on, we can run from here.” Nic said as he broke out in a run. The houses all seemed the same, but Nic’s house was the only two story house on the block.

DT ran after Nic, laughing. "Why do you always do that when I'm not ready?" He asked as he ran.

“To try to keep you on your toes!” Nic called over his shoulder. The two ran along the sidewalk until they reached Nic’s house. He walked up to the garage and opened the door. As usual, his parent’s black Lamborghini was parked on the left, but on the right where two slick motorcycles, unlike any other. Futuristic looking, yet perfectly real. One was a blood red while the other was a shiny blue. Nic went over to a table and grabbed a couple of helmets. “Here you go.” He tossed the blue one to DT and placed the red one on his head.

DT put the helmet on his head and smiled. "Glad I got a license for this kind of stuff." He said, mounting the bike. "It's really comfortable. You don't ever see that on cycles these days." He said. "Can't wait to drive it."

“Yeah, but then again, you don’t see cycles like these.” Nic said as he mounted his own. “By the way, there is a mic and speaker in the helmet so we can communicate. Put ‘em in yesterday.”

DT smiled. "How thoughtful." He said through the helmet's mic. He closed the visor and walked the bike out of the garage. "Time to kick it into high gear." He said and revved the engine

Nic also walked his bike out of the garage. He let down the kickstand and got off to close the garage door. “Let’s ride.” He said as he climbed back on and started the bike. He revved the engine, the shot off down the drive, taking a quick right turn.

DT sped off with Nic, matching his speed. "Damn, this thing rides smooth!" He said through the mic. "Your parents are freaking godsends."

“Yeah. Let’s go to the track, show off the bikes.” Nic said as he sped up, going slightly over the speed limit, but not enough to get into trouble. “The other riders will probably be jealous.”

DT sped right alongside Nic. "Oh, hell yeah." He said in a mock evil tone. "This'll be awesome."

“I think there is a few races today. Team races. Wanna join?” Nic said as he sped around a left turn. “I hear they are giving out a few hundred bucks work of equipment.”

DT’s eyebrows went up. "Did you honestly think there was even a minute chance that I’d refuse?" He asked deviously.

“Had to ask, pal.” Nic said. “Call Jake.” He said into the mic and activated the voice activated cell phone.

Jake picked up a few seconds later. “Hello?”

“Jake, this is Nic. Enter me and DT into the races today. And be sure to bet on us.” Nic said and hung up.

DT smiled. "So, guess we're deadset on winning, eh?" He cracked his neck. "I figured as much."

“These things get up to 300mph easily. The race will be a piece of cake.” Nic said.

DT whistled. "300? We're winning." He said, dead sure of himself. "And the way these things handle, 300 is gonna feel like 10 for us."

They turned right one last time and a large race track came into view. Motorcycles of all kinds where there, scattered around the field. Most of them where setting up at the starting line. “Looks like we are right on time.” Nic said as they drove onto the field without slowing down. “Let’s get on the end.” He said, driving toward the last two spots in line.

DT drove right next to Nic. "Look at all these old junkers." He said to Nic. "Some of these things are practically falling apart."

Nic glanced at the other bikes. “Yeah. It looks like this one will be simple.” All the other contestants were looking at Nic and DT, all except one. He wore a black motorcycle jacket, black gloves, dark blue jeans, and his face was obscured by his black helmet. His bike looked old, but powerful. “Looks like we may have some real competition with that guy.” Nic said.

DT nodded. "That guy's got some horsepower... That's an old Harley-Davidson. Hard to come by, but really powerful stuff."

Nic felt something then, a strange sense of déjà vu. He stared at the man, and as if he could sense that stare, turned his head and looked at Nic. His visor was tinted, so his face was invisible, but his eyes were clear as they glowed red. He turned and looked forward again. Nic also looked forward, that strange feeling still there. “I think I know that guy from somewhere. I don’t know where, but I can’t help feel as though I met him before.”

DT shivered. "That guy's eyes give me the creeps." He muttered. "And why do you know a guy like that? He's just... Weird." He took a deep breath. "I hope we can beat him."

“I don’t know. I just can’t shake the feeling that I have met him before.” He shook his head. “Forget it. Let’s just focus on the race.”

DT nodded. "That's what we came here for, right?" He said, and smiled. "We're gonna get that top prize. Even Scary McGlowyeyes can't stop us."

A gunshot signaled the start of the race. Each competitor shot forward, their bikes roaring loud enough to be deafening. However, Nic, DT, and the stranger pulled ahead of the rest. “We got 200 laps. Let’s see how long this guy can keep up.” He said to DT as he accelerated to 250, which the man matched, but went no higher. “I think he wants to play with us.”

DT stayed with Nic, keeping at the same speed. "Well, if he wants to mess around, then let's mess around." He revved his engine, challenging the mysterious man. "C'mon, watcha got?"

The stranger seemed oblivious to DT, but instead focused entirely upon Nic. “This guy is seriously creepy. I think he only wants to go against me.”

DT scoffed. Well that's BS. He thought. Obviously he doesn't know about my heritage... But neither does Nic. He sighed. "Fine, have your little game then. I'll win the race for us." He raced ahead, overclocking the bike's engine at 320 MPH.

Nic glanced over at the stranger, his feeling of déjà vu getting stronger. He turned back to the road and sped up, going at an even 350, yet the man matched his speed. “Damn, what is this guy’s problem?!” Nic said.

DT jumped as the two overtook him. "How is he going so fast with such an old bike?!" He shouted, surprised. He gunned the engine, keeping up with them. "Nic, he's baiting you! Can't you tell?"

Nic smiled at the comment. “Then if he wants to play, let’s crank this up.” He pushed the bike to 500, reaching maximum speed before the bike would start to overheat. Yet again, the man caught up to Nic, but with more trouble than before. “Damn…” he muttered. He then looked at the biker and was surprised to see him looking back at him, his glowing eyes staring hungrily at Nic.

DT muttered to himself. "My god this guy's annoying..." He grumbled and revved hard, going to 500 and catching up with Nic. "We gotta end this soon." He said to Nic. "That guy is seriously weirding me out."

“Yeah…” Nic said, his voice distant. The biker reached up and gripped his helmet, the pulled it off and tossed it away, revealing his face. His skin was a wrinkled black and his dirty blonde hair was hanging in his face. His yellowish teeth were sharp enough that one could imagine just what this guy ate. “What the hell?!?” Nic cried.

DT blinked once, then again when the man's monstrous visage didn't go away. His skin was pale and strangely out of place, as if someone has laid a sheet of skin on him, stretched it, and then stitched it shut. He took a deep breath. If I don't do something... He thought. I may lose my friend. But if I DO do something, I have an equal chance at losing him...

Nic instinctively knew that this thing had to be killed somehow. He hit the brakes, skidding to a halt as the man mimicked his action. The crowd, finally able to see what had been going on, screamed as they saw the man’s face, yet they did not leave their seats, stunned by what they had seen. Nic climbed from his bike as well, pulling off his helmet as he did so.

DT stopped right next to Nic and stepped off. He ripped his helmet off forcefully and threw it at the demonic man, then held his arm out to his side to stop Nic from moving. "I need to do this. I've kept the truth from you for too long."

Nic’s eyes turned black and he strode forward, pushing past DT as though he wasn’t there. He stopped directly in front of the man and stared into his red eyes. The man reached towards Nic’s neck, but before it touched him, Nic punched him, sending him flying back. Nic’s demeanor changed as he charged towards the man. “Death has come for you.” He said in a strange accent as he grabbed the man and pulled him off the ground by his neck, then he snapped the man’s neck with a quick twist and let him drop to the ground. Nic blinked a few times as his eyes changed to grey.

DT's jaw dropped. "His power is not that of a human..." He muttered. "It is far greater... Greater than even mine..."

Nic was about to turn and walk away when something caught his eyes. It was as strange necklace made of a chain and a strange symbol. The chain links were alternating black and white and the symbol was of two interlocking dragons, one white and the other black. “What is this?” Nic said to himself as he bent down and picked it up. It seemed familiar to him, like it belonged to him. He glanced up at the crowd. They gasped, but not at Nic, but at the man. He started to turn to dust and his motorcycle fell apart. Nic walked back to DT. “I think we should go.”

DT nodded. "Damn... I wanted that guy's bike... Well, crap happens. Let's go." He turned away, trying to hide his fear and probably failing. Nic had a sense for things like that.

As they walked back to the bikes, Nic looked at the necklace in his hands, and after some debating, put it around his neck, the cool metal feeling comfortable against his bare skin. He picked up his helmet, put it on, and then climbed on his motorcycle.

DT was shaken from the disturbance. He walked right past his bike. "Sorry Nic." He called over his shoulder. "I can't ride. Too messed up right now..."

Nic looked at DT. “At least to the parking lot. We need to get these off the track and out of the way.” He said, a strange feeling coming over him. He felt lightheaded, his body going numb, and the world going grey. He shook his head and the world came back to him, the numb feeling passing.

DT sighed. "Alright, but if I crash into something... It's going on your head." He picked up his helmet and mounted the bike.

Nic nodded, then turned and started his bike. How did I kill that guy and what was he? He asked himself as he drove off the track, DT close behind him.

DT let out a sigh of relief. I'm so glad Nic was able to handle it... He thought. I would've revealed myself... My true self... To all those people...

Nic chose a parking spot in the corner of the lot and parked his bike. “We can come pick them up tomorrow. They won’t be going anywhere.” He flipped up a small panel and typed in a passcode that locked the wheels in place.

DT took a deep breath. "Good. I wouldn't want you getting them stolen." His voice seemed to lack the charm he usually had, and instead was cold and distant, like something was eating at him.

Nic climbed off his bike, then stood still a minute. He looked at DT. “Back there, before I killed that… whatever it was, you said you kept the truth from me for too long. What did you mean?” He asked.

DT looked at the ground for a moment. "I... I will tell you tomorrow." He looked Nic in the eyes. "We have to be alone when I do, though. Promise me." He sounded absolutely serious. Too serious for someone like him, almost. He was never this serious about anything, except maybe women.

Nic stared right back into those eyes. “Ok.” He said, confident that DT would tell him. He turned around and started to walk to the exit of the parking lot.

DT walked with him. "You are sure?" He said. If he had made a mistake, Nic may hate him, or be afraid of him... He had to see this through to the end now, though.

Nic glanced at DT. “You have always kept your word, no matter what. If you say you will tell me, then you will.”

DT nodded and smiled.

End

Motorcycles: Red ; Blue

This had to be posted in two parts.
 

Nicodemus Zamoran

The Hellslayer Knight
Yes. I am very busy. Working on Chapter 2 at the moment, as well as Random Encounter #4-II, while chatting with people, listening to music, and uploading a video to youtube, all while I am roaming this forum ;)
 

Nicodemus Zamoran

The Hellslayer Knight
Mortal ~ Chapter 2 by Nicodemus Zamoran and DreadnoughtDT

Mortal ~ Chapter 2

Nicodemus stood in a dense fog, the rotting corpses of demons scattered around him. His black clothes stained with blood, and his cloak torn. Crimson blood dripped from the tips of his swords. His head was bowed, his black hair hanging in his face, his breath coming in ragged gasps. There was a large gash in his left arm, the blood mostly dried now. Nicodemus looks up slowly as three demons appeared. The three demons looked like human men, wearing black cloaks with red trim that obscured their faces in shadow, to the point that they could not be seen. Their sibilant hissing filled the air as they circled Nic, crouched in an animalistic manner. Nic’s eyes followed them, waiting for them to attack, his grip tightening on his swords.

One of them, wearing a much more ornamental robe, drew its arms in close to its body and twitched, then pounced at Nic, the other two following in succession. Nic jumped into the air and kicked the one in front of him in the face, using the momentum to backflip over the other two. He landed agilely and charged at the small group.

The one that was kicked screamed in a high-pitched, wailing manner. The other two walked over to it and helped it up, and then cowered as the leader-like one seemed to scold them. One pointed as Nic charged, and the leader turned halfway, then extended his arm. Several tendrils of darkness extended from his seemingly empty sleeve, whipping and spiraling towards Nic.

Nic slashed at the tendrils with the white blade he held, and they dissipated. He then threw the black blade at one of the demons, the blade impaling itself into the demons chest. The impaled demon shrieked and fell to the ground, black smoke emitting from every open spot in its cloak. The cloak flattened when it hit the ground, empty.

The leader demon yelled something to the other, weaker demon, who nodded quickly after cowering a bit and drew a blackened sword, rushing at Nic. Nic spun and kicked the demon in the chest, sending him flying back. He raised his hand and the black blade that he had thrown appeared once more in his hand, and he charged at the demon, the blades held diagonally to his side. The lesser demon held it's arms out, a worthless gesture of defense.

The leader demon sighed and allowed Nic to attack the lesser demon as punishment. The white blade bit into the cowering demon’s neck, slicing through it easily. The leader demon shrugged off his robe, showing his true, shadow-like form, as the dead demon dropped to the ground. His face was featureless except for two eyes that glowed with a dark green hue. His claws were enormously long, almost as long as his arms themselves. He pointed at Nic with one claw, hissing softly.

Nic smiled slightly. “Come on, ugly. Let’s see what you can do.” He said as he moved into a fighting stance.

The demon mimicked Nic almost perfectly, ripping one of its own claws out as a sword. "Come on, ugly." It mimicked in a distorted voice. "Let's see what you can do."

Nic walked forward slowly, then kicked one of the dead demon’s cloak into the air, distracting the final demon, and charged at him. The demon shrieked and charged at Nic, it's claws ready to tear at his flesh. Nic slashed with one of the blades, cutting one of the demon’s hands off, and jumped to the side, readying himself to strike again.

From the demon's wound poured black smoke, like the defeated demons. However, it wasn't actually smoke, but blood that was spraying out at high-pressure. Higher pressure than any human's blood, at least. It screamed towards the sky and dissipated, then reformed behind Nic. Nic quickly turned around. “What a tricky devil you are.” He said. He positioned his swords like pincers, only sideways. The white blade, he held above his head, and the black he held at his waist, both pointed at the demon.

The demon made a reverberating, low noise that sounded like laughing. It split in two and the two new demons moved around to Nic's sides. One had claws on its left limbs only, and the other had claws only on its right limbs. They both laughed and charged at Nic, screaming.

Nic flipped into the air backwards, avoiding the two, and landing agilely, then charged forward and thrust his swords into the two demons. Both demons shrieked and dissipated into clouds of black, ichorous blood. Nic stood straight, head down, as his weapons vanished as well. His eyes slowly changed to a dark blue as the fog around him dissipated, revealing thousands of dead demons, the grass around the bodies dead and limp. Nic looked up at the sky and yelled. His cry, filled with sorrow and rage, echoed across the field.


Nic sat up in bed, his eyes a deep blue. It’s that man again… He thought. For years, Nic would have dreams of a strange man who looked a lot like himself, but older. In each of the dreams, the man was fighting some form of demon, always using the same weapons. Nic shook his head, the dream still vivid in his mind. He looked at the clock. 7:19 am. He sighed and lay back down.

DT sighed and tried calling Nic for the fourth time. He hadn't gone to sleep the entire night, so he had been trying to call him to pass the time. Even though he should feel tired, his nerves were still shot from yesterday, and he couldn't sleep.

Nic picked up on the third ring. “Hello?”

DT took a deep breath. "Sorry for calling so early... But, I haven't been able to sleep." He paused for a second. "So, what's up?"

“Nothing really. Just had a dream about that strange guy again. This one was so vivid, far more vivid than the others I told you about.” Nic said.

DT's brow furrowed. "That's odd. New demons this time?" He got out his note-pad. He loved to document the demons in Nic's dreams. Not as a joke, but because he liked to draw them after he'd written notes about them. As a past-time.

“Yeah.” Nic said, then described the dream in detail.

DT whistled softly. "That's going to be a lot to draw for just one demon, y'know." Then he sighed. "It seems that these dreams are a recurring thing for you, too. And quite frankly, I bet it bugs you."

“A little, yeah. He looks a lot like me, yet I have no idea who he is and where he is, although I am pretty sure he is in the past.” Nic said.

"Maybe it's faded memories?" DT suggested thoughtfully.

Nic sighed. They had had this conversation a hundred times before. “Yeah, maybe.”

Nic sat up in bed, still holding the phone to his ear, and pulled out his sketchbook. In it where many drawings of the two swords that the man wielded. He had searched through many books to find out what they were, but was never able to find them. They were just as mysterious as the dreams themselves.

DT sighed. "I know you must be tired of this kind of conversation..." He muttered. "But you know... You've never elaborated on those swords you were purportedly wielding. What do they do?"

Nic thought for a second, realizing that he never contemplated that aspect. “I don’t really know. I have only seen then used to kill demons.” He said.

DT nodded. "I see... Well, I guess since we're up, and it's just barely starting to get light out..." He paused, hoping Nic would know what he was about to ask.

“Yeah, sure. Be at the Spot at 8. I’ll meet you then.” Nic said, then hung up. He sighed and got up.

After Nic had showered and dressed, he glanced at the night table beside his bed. The strange necklace he got yesterday sat there, seeming to call to him. He walked over and picked it up, examining the necklace again. So much detail had been put into it. Even the chain links where different. At a glance, it looks smooth, but once you examine it, you see small runes carved all over the metal. Nic put it on, the weight of the metal seemed to comfort him. He then left the house and headed for the spot, merely fifteen minute walk away.

~~~~

DT was already at the usual spot before Nic arrived. He was sitting on a tree stump, making patterns in the dirt with his toes. He wasn't wearing his usual street clothes, instead wearing a white sleeveless T-shirt and a blue half-robe.

Nic entered the small clearing and walked over to DT. “So, what’s up?”

DT looked up and smiled slightly, but the life seemed to be gone from his eyes. "I told you that I couldn't keep the truth from you forever." He said in a dark tone. "We've been friends since I was six..." He got up off the tree stump. "This is something I gotta do." Nic’s eyes changed to a darker blue as he nodded, indicating DT to go on. DT took a deep breath. "I should tell you before I show you..." He looked at the ground, contemplating if he could back out or not. He decided against doing so in less than a second. "I am half wolf." He clenched his jaw and shut his eyes tight, waiting for Nic to start laughing or saying that he's insane.

As Nic heard those words, a thousand thoughts ran through his mind, but none of them ever doubted that DT was telling the truth. “Go on.” He said, a serious look on his face.

DT opened his eyes slowly. "You... You believe me?"

“I’ve known you for years. I know you enough to know when you are lying, or telling the truth.” He said in a serious tone.

DT nodded. "I suppose this is where I show you, right?" He said, his confidence restored somewhat.

Nic nodded. “If you want.” He said. His voice revealed his curiosity, but not much.

DT held out his necklace. "This is more than just a pretty piece of craftsmanship." He said as it segmented and opened into four sections, rearranging itself. The cross in it extended outwards as the segments rearranged and fit back together. The cross then flipped upside down and retracted back into the necklace. "It is something far more than that." DT muttered, his voice now with a growling tone to it. A black mist surrounded DT, making him hard to see, although it was evident he was changing. The mist soon dissipated, showing DT's new form. A humanoid wolf with metal gauntlets and greaves, made of the same material as his now changed necklace.

Nic inhaled sharply. The change wasn’t drastic, but the gauntlets and grieves caught his eye. Upon them, the same runes where carved as the ones on his coin. He pulled it out to make sure, and the runes matched exactly.

"I know." DT said quickly. "It is much to take in in such a short amount of time." He sat back down on the tree stump. "It's odd, though... I don't know why I'm like this. I just am."

“Do you have a way to explain this?” Nic asked, indicating the runes that were carved in DT’s gauntlets and grieves as well as his coin.

DT's now pure white eyes widened. "I do not." He said, baffled. "That is something that I have never noticed..."

Nic stared at the coin. “Ok.” He said. His father had given him this coin. It had been passed down in his family for generations, supposedly a good luck charm. It was worth billions, yet it was far too precious to the family to sell.

DT's wolf ears perked up as he heard a hissing noise in the far distance. Since his senses were honed to almost a ridiculous point, he was sure Nic hadn't hear them yet. He jumped to Nic and brought him to the ground. "Stay down." He whispered in Nic's ear. "There is something close by."

Nic soon heard the hissing as well. He instantly recognized them. “It’s those demons from my dream…” He muttered.

DT gritted his teeth. "Are you sure?" He said, looking around to see if the demons were around. He couldn't see them yet, but he could almost feel their gaze beating down on him.

Nic pushed DT off of him with little difficulty and stood up. “Yes, I am sure.” He said, his eyes slowly changing to a blood red.

DT's gauntlets extended brass claws as the demons drew closer. He marveled at them for a brief moment. "They've never done THAT before..." He muttered as three demons, wearing black cloaks with red trim, walked forward. One was wearing a more ornamental cloak, just like Nic's dream.

Nic turned his body to the side and raised his hands, smoothly moving into a martial arts stance.

DT shook his head in disbelief. "First we had crazy motorcycle demon, and now evil cloaked demons?" He scraped his gauntlet's claws together. "This just gets better and better..."

The lesser demons hissed and circled the two, hunched over animalistically. DT held his arms out to his sides tauntingly. "C'mon, make a move!" He yelled to the two.

Nic faced one of them, his eyes blood red. “Let’s dance.” He said, the charged forward and kicked the demon in its chest.

The other demon tried to attack Nic, but DT pounced in front of it and slashed at it, putting gashes in its robe and making a spout of black blood issue forth.

“Thanks, DT.” Nic said over his shoulder. He faced the demon in front of him. He ran forward and spun, kicking the demon in the chest. He then quickly crouched and swiped the feet out from under the demon.

As the demon fell, DT shoved his claws upwards through its chest, piercing it all way through and making it scream as its body disappeared, nothing but the cloak remaining.

Nic turned on the other lesser demon, its blood still pouring from the tears in its cloak. He ran and kicked it in the chest, causing it to fly and strike a tree. Nic continued forward and punched the demon in the chest. He then grabbed it and threw it towards DT.

DT held both arms out, stabbing the demon through the chest. It struggled for a moment and then went limp as it dissipated like the other demon.

Nic turned to the last demon. “It looks like we have one more.” He said as he moved into a fighting stance.

The demon crossed it's arms, obviously disappointed in it's subordinates. It raised it's arms and black tendrils shot forth, wrapping around Nic and DT, completely immobilizing them. A voice rang through their minds. "The time of death is upon you. No escape. No second chances."

As Nic struggled, he felt the metal of the necklace heat up. He soon saw that it was emitting a strange light that damaged the tendrils of darkness. The demon shrieked and let go of Nic, but as it did so, it squeezed DT tighter, trying to crush the life from him. The glow of the necklace grew brighter and suddenly two swords appeared in front of Nic. They where the swords from the dream. Nic smiled ruefully. “Let’s see how long you survive against these.” He said as he grabbed them and charged at the demon.

The demon held up it's free arm and a wall of tendrils appeared, as solid as steel. "Break through that, why don't you?" The demon said in a raspy, whispery voice.

Nic jumped at the wall and practically ran up it. When he reached the top, he stood and looked down on the demon. “Oh, was that supposed to stop me?” He asked sarcastically. He then jumped down and landed agilely, then stood straight. “Let’s see you dance, demon.”

The demon scoffed and released his grip on DT. "I do not dance, human. However, I bet you could." He whipped at Nic's feet, making him jump back a bit. "Most amusing, humans are..." The demon said darkly.

Nic cracked his neck. “You won’t find me the least bit amusing.” He said and charged.

The demon created another wall right in front of Nic. "On the contrary, you are the most interesting and most amusing human I've met... Except for the furry one over there. He's an oddity as well."

This time, Nic slashed at the wall and it dissipated. He ran and thrust the two blades into the demon’s chest. “Like I said, you won’t find me amusing.”

The demon laughed. "Skill such as yours is too great for me to not be amused." It laughed again. "Perhaps I have been taking it too easy on you."

Nic yanked the swords from the demon and jumped back. “You haven’t even moved from that spot.”

The demon laughed. "This requires a new tactic." He shrugged off the cloak, revealing his true shadowy form. "Let's... How you say... Dance."

DT got up and stumbled to Nic's side. "I hope you hadn't counted me out yet." He smiled and turned to the demon.

Nic glanced at DT. “Not at all my friend. You were only taking a rest, as I saw it.” He said as he raised one of the blades above his head and placed the other at his waist like the strange warrior had done in his dream.

The demon laughed. "That's right! He used to do the same exact thing." He said cryptically.

DT furrowed his brow. "Who's "he", smart guy?"

The demon scoffed. "As if I should tell lowlife humans such as yourselves. You are undeserving of such divine knowledge."

As Nic stood there, a thought popped into his head. “It was the Hellslayer Knight, wasn’t it?” He asked in a low tone.

The demon laughed. "The peabrain figured it out!" He said in a mocking tone.

“DT,” Nic said in a light tone of voice, “shall we dispose of this nuisance?”

DT cracked his neck. "Yes, we shall."

The demon stopped laughing. "Two against one hardly seems fair. Allow me to even up the odds." He split in two, just like Nic's dream. "This is where your journeys end!" The left half yelled. The right half remained silent and charged at the two.

Nic charged forward and delivered a kick that sent the charging demon flying back. “You aren’t so tough for a demon.” He said mockingly.

Both demons snarled and leaped forward, one going for Nic and the other for DT. DT grabbed the demon by the arm and threw him at a nearby tree, then stomped on its chest, crushing its ribcage. It disappeared in a puff of black smoke.

Nic threw the blades to the ground, impaling them in the ground on either side of the remaining demon. The necklace that Nic wore flashed and bolts of lightning flew from the blades, black from the black blade, white from the white blade.

The demon shrieked as it was electrocuted, and then started laughing. "Your power is indeed that of the Hellslayer Knight...!" It said surprisingly enthusiastically. "Magnificent...! Truly magnificent...!" It fell to the ground, charred. "May the savior of Hell, Zeron, grace you!" As he uttered those last words, his body exploded into black smoke like the others.

Nic stared at where the demon had dissipated. How did I do that? He thought to himself.

DT sighed and lifted his necklace so he could look at it. "They came for this, I bet..." He said softly.

Nic walked over and pulled the swords from the ground, then looked at DT. “It is either that or my necklace. This stuff didn’t start until yesterday. Why do you think that is?”

DT shook his head. "Probably because we're magnets for trouble, as usual..." He stopped, thinking. "What did he mean by that? 'May the savior of Hell, Zeron, grace you'?"

“I am not sure. But since we now have some names, we may actually figure out what is going on.” Nic said. He held the swords up and they vanished. “At least I won’t have to deal with hiding the swords.”

DT sighed. "You're lucky. I have to wait for an hour before I can turn back." He looked at his hands. "God, I'm such a freak..."

Nic smiled. "You aren't a freak. You are unique, just like you should be." He said.

"Heh, thanks..." He muttered. "It's nice that you don't care. Cuz the first person I showed it to freaked out and ran... Then every time I got close to someone, I got afraid that I'd mess up one day..."

Nic looked at DT, a serious look on his face. “Friends to the end, man. Friends to the end.”

End

EDIT: Forgot the foot note

DT wolf form
 

Brunette Keeper [Jess]

The Black Locker
Well, it's actually kind of decent, but there should be improvements to be made on it.

1.
Okay, I know you want your characters to be powerful and all, but in the first part of the first chapter, I'm already seeing pre-power Gary Stu-ism. The black locker immediately screams to me, "status-seeking", and DT's "skill" for remembering "just enough" to pass tests tells me that the test was merely thrown in to introduce the characters, and you don't even do that properly.

2.
I feel like we're thrown into the middle of the first chapter - we don't get an introduction, but the chapter actually starts in a nice place: a school classroom. Throwing at least a "his best friend" or maybe a flashback would be nice.

3.
There's a bit too much filler. The dialogue about the teacher and Jessica both seem out of place, and the three guys there are just thrown in to reveal their fighting skills. Cutting out Jessica would be nice unless she actually had a place in the plot, and the teacher dialogue has to go.

4.
Being the Grammar Nazi I am, I tend to notice typos. If you're quoting something inside of dialogue, you use single quotation marks - 'like these' - and you missed a few question marks here and there. It can be fixed using spellcheck, but it's enough to get one paranoid.

5.
There's actually a bit of wordiness that clogs up the story. You overly describe things ("conspiratorially", for example) in order to keep up with a nonexistent word count.

Tell-tale quotes:
DT brushed another couple wayward hairs out of his face. "You think so? No wonder that girl Jessica likes me so much."
“Yeah. She probably has your picture somewhere. Heck, I think half the girls in school have your picture stashed somewhere.” Nic said, grinning.
No. Just no. I'd understand one or even three girls or a clique of five or more - that's understandable. However, HALF of the girls in the school screams Gary Stu to me.

DT scoffed. Well that's BS. He thought. Obviously he doesn't know about my heritage... But neither does Nic. He sighed. "Fine, have your little game then. I'll win the race for us." He raced ahead, overclocking the bike's engine at 320 MPH.
1. Again, why the Gary Stu-ism? Not only that, but DT's "heritage" wasn't hinted at until now.
2. The fastest motorbike in the world goes up to 305 mph in the fifth gear, and it obviously doesn't belong to you two. Do you even realize how much mechanical know-how that would require?

Nic glanced over at the stranger, his feeling of déjà vu getting stronger. He turned back to the road and sped up, going at an even 350, yet the man matched his speed. “Damn, what is this guy’s problem?!” Nic said.
No. Not possible at all.

The first chapter has flaws, but a bit of changes could improve it. I have to leave for work sooner or later, so I'll read the second part later.
 

Nicodemus Zamoran

The Hellslayer Knight
I have a question for you.

How the hell did you get "pre-power Gary Stu-ism" and "status-seeking" from Nic having a black locker? I gave him a black locker because his color is black. His clothes and hair is black. His past self, Nicodemus Zamoran, wore black clothes and had black hair. When he gains the powers of the Lord of Weapons, his armor is black. When he gets the form of Jak the Reaper, his hair, clothes, and even his good eye is black. Black is his color.
 

Daring Dylan

This is all we got now.
Nicodemus Zamoran;263259 said:
I have a question for you.

How the hell did you get "pre-power Gary Stu-ism" and "status-seeking" from Nic having a black locker? I gave him a black locker because his color is black. His clothes and hair is black. His past self, Nicodemus Zamoran, wore black clothes and had black hair. When he gains the powers of the Lord of Weapons, his armor is black. When he gets the form of Jak the Reaper, his hair, clothes, and even his good eye is black. Black is his color.

A couple of things, Nic.

1. I love how you overlook all of Jess' advice and skip right to the black locker. There was so much stuff she said, and you ignore it all for something like that. Anyways, Nic's black locker isn't status seeking on his part, it's status seeking on your part. You're trying too hard to make him look good, cool, likable, etc.

2. I refuse to have you talking to her like that. She offers you legitimate, constructive criticism and you jump down her throat. Talk like that to her again, and you'll have me to deal with.
 

DreadnoughtDT

God of Hyperdeath
Premium
Supporter 2014
And if you get on his case, you have me to deal with.

Or we can all just not argue. I'm not the confrontive type, you know.
 

Nicodemus Zamoran

The Hellslayer Knight
I didn't ignore her advice, I just didn't mention it in that post. I saw what she was talking about. All I wanted to know was why she selected the locker. I gave him the locker for the sole reason that his color is black. Not because he is cool or likable, but because it is his color.
 

Daring Dylan

This is all we got now.
So? In my stories, Julie's color is orange, but she doesn't have an orange locker; her's are green like everyone elses.

Oh, and if his color IS black, don't you think it's just a little, I don't know, coincidental he got the only black locker in school? |:
 

Meg

Well-known Member
Moderator
My God this is the second time I had to step in today. Gees. Alright, look. All of you need to cool it! Don't turn this into something big. Jess made some very VERY good points here. Nic, I mean absolutely no offense on your part when I say this, but yeah this story screams Gary Sue. I felt the same way with the Shadowrun RP -which I believe I hinted at before- and Jess was not out of line in pointing that out. She was just giving you some constructive criticism. The face that she took the time to type all that out shows she wants to help.

Come on now, we're all adults here (I guess). Let's all chill and bake cupcakes or whatever.
 

Nicodemus Zamoran

The Hellslayer Knight
I didn't plan on mentioning this, but considering the fact that you are the second one that said something like that meg, I am starting to get really ****ed. I don't care how Gary Stuish or Suish these stories are, don't call anything of mine that if I can see it.

Yeah, Jess made some good points. I didn't deny that. I just wanted to know her problem with the locker. That is all I asked. I wasn't mean. I wasn't ignoring anything. Just because I don't post about the points she made doesn't mean I didn't take them into account. I only asked one question and I seemed to get flamed for asking it.
 

Meg

Well-known Member
Moderator
My. God. This is getting stupid. I wasn't aiming that only at you, Nic. And I said I meant no offense. I think you're a cool guy, Nic. I just wanted EVERYONE who is getting upset about this to see. Now then. If you don't mind how Gary Sue-ish your characters are then by all means keep on writing, but d so knowing that very few people like Gary Sues and are gonna say stuff.
 
Top Bottom