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Blast Back (an episodic dungeonpunk adventure)

TWOxACROSS

Hot-blooded God of Guns
Premium
Okay! So Chapter III is in it's editing stages, sitting in the hands of my friends to give it a critical and objective eye. Should be seeing it pop up on the blarg sometime within the week or so (hopefully).

Really sorry for all the delays.
 

Rebel Dynasty

Creator of Microcosms
Premium
The little bits of banter between Chorem and Dylock were amusing; it's good to also see they've aged up a bit. :)

Your descriptions of the more emotional parts were very well written, as well; it was like I could see, hear, and feel all of it very clearly.

This story has been really enjoyable, so far. :)
 

TWOxACROSS

Hot-blooded God of Guns
Premium
Damn you read fast! Haha

I was worried about the emotional scene because I didn't want to make it melodramatic, or at least not overly so. Good to hear that I seem to have pulled it off :p

From here on out it's only gonna get better, too! :D
 

Rebel Dynasty

Creator of Microcosms
Premium
Damn you read fast! Haha

I was worried about the emotional scene because I didn't want to make it melodramatic, or at least not overly so. Good to hear that I seem to have pulled it off :p

From here on out it's only gonna get better, too! :D

Lol, so I've been told. ;)

I hear ya; I have so much trouble when it comes to writing emotions; I actually have to stop and think about how to do it, and how to balance it out between wooden and angst-ridden. XD Yes, you definitely pulled it off; I particularly liked how Chorem was trying to use levity in the situation, despite how sad he was. The dialogue between Dylock and Din likewise showed the weight of what was happening in a very realistic light.

I'm looking forward to reading more; I can practically feel the build up, here, especially now, given what Dy is considering. I can't wait to see how it pans out.
 

Erian1Mortal

Well-known Member
Premium
As always, it was a well written chapter!
And as Rebel said, the emotional scene was written really good, really realistic, it reminded me a little of my grandparents last days, in a good way of course.
The banter was quite amusing as well, fitting for the characters.
The only thing I would've liked to see is a little bit more of the time Dy and Chorem had at the Academy, since it could've been used to further the readers understanding of how the world this story plays in works. I know many people probably find stuff like that boring, but I like stuff like that, it gives a lot of depht to stories. But I guess you could still use pieces of that in flashbacks.
I'm intrigued by that tower mage, I guess he wasn't mentioned for nothing. As always, I'm looking forward to more, but do take your time, a project like this deserves to be taken slowly, as I've been learning with my own book lately^^
 

TWOxACROSS

Hot-blooded God of Guns
Premium
Now that the newest mission for DmC -StH- is up and running, its's on to more Blast Backy things! Especially now, I get to work a little harder on conceptual stuff that I can show off for patrons, too!

First order of business is drawing the characters, and trying to refrain from making them all look super stylish like Final Fantasy characters. Instead! I gotta make them look natural, while invariably still injecting some kind of style into their wardrobe because I cannot help myself.

So...bumpkin chic!
 

TWOxACROSS

Hot-blooded God of Guns
Premium
Despite everything going on with me possibly moving and starting university in a month or so, I've still managed to get some progress made in the next chapter, and here's a small taste from the rough draft so far.

-----------------------------------​

The youngest sister blew out the candles set up in the middle of the long table, and Chorem immediately sighed.
“Chorem! Do it again! Do it again!” the sister pleaded.
“Okay! But stop doing that. This is the last time,” Chorem said.
The young mage held his hand forward, holding his fingers in the shape of a pistol. He pointed at the candle on the far end of the table, and flicked his wrist, mimicking the recoil of a fired gun. The wick of the candle instantly produced a small flame, and Chorem swept his hand across the table, pointing at the other candles and lighting them in kind. The children cheered, and Chorem rolled his eyes.
“At least someone likes your parlor tricks, Chor,” Dylock joked.
“We love his tricks!” the children cheered.
“Oh, you guys love my tricks, do you?” Chorem asked, a smirk growing on his face at the same time as a ghoulish apparition rose up behind the unaware children in their seats. It loomed closer and closer, opening a ghastly maw as black as pitch as its red eyes gleamed.
Chorem’s mother glanced at the apparition. “Chorem, not at the dinner table!” she said sternly, slamming her fork against her plate.
The shadow quickly receded, disappearing into nothing as Chorem’s shoulders rose tensely as he cowered in his chair. “Apologies,” he muttered.
 

TWOxACROSS

Hot-blooded God of Guns
Premium
So! I am hard at work (still) trying to finish some Patreon rewards for supporters. I'm sorry I haven't been around much, finding an apartment became a much more pressing matter :p Also, up next on the roster is s'posed to be a new mission for DmC -Stairway to Heaven- which I've had in my head for a while now too.

I really gotta get back into this if I want to continue having an income @_@
 

TWOxACROSS

Hot-blooded God of Guns
Premium
Allo kiddies! So in an effort to allow myself the opportunity for more exposure, and to do more to market myself, I created a facebook page for my writing position. If you've got yourself a facebook profile and happen to dig my work, do me a solid and Like the page :D Then be sure to turn on Notifications so you can be kept abreast of my shenanigans!

As always, thank you for your support, and Keep Yourself Alive!
 

TWOxACROSS

Hot-blooded God of Guns
Premium
HOLY CRAP-BISCUITS! I finally finished Chapter V! It's been over a year T_T I am so sorry. Luckily, I only have one more semester that demands my attention, and then there should be a way better schedule for sharing my stuff. I hope you enjoy the new chapter, and if you didn't know, I have a page on facebook you can follow, and a twitter.

I also recently revised the old chapters a bit, so you might even want to go back and check them to see how they have changed - nothing major to the plot, though, just some extra flavor and tightening up vernacular between characters.
 
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