What would you do?

[Dante's Stalker]

Hey guys, so, I just want to apologize if anyone assumed this is another thread where fictitious scenarios are given and options on what to do is handed out. It's not one of those, SOWWY! But I thought the title read better than the original 'a question for all atheists and spiritualists alike' anyway.

So I haz this.... issue, I suppose you could call it.

Important to Note
My mum is Christian-turn-atheist and she's going to be staying with us for a wee while yet. I'm a (mostly) practicing Christian. No, not the brain-washed type, thank you, I actually do research my religion as hard and in-depth as a mum who (for example) just found out her kid has some rash and will turn over every corner stone to determine wtf it is herself.

The Backstory
Now....a few months back (I'm not sure whether I shared this with anyone here or not), I was getting the kids ready for school in the dining room. I was crouched down in the doorway with my back to the kitchen, helping my daughter button up her mis-matched button-up jersey. My daughter, whom is 7 years old and autistic (*please see here for groundwork: http://www.autism.com/understanding_lying) looked up and past me suddenly, then looked down and said "Mum I just saw a man in red in the kitchen".

Why, yes, I shat myself dizzy spinning around to see who was in my kitchen. No one.
NO ONE.
Their dad already left for work. It was just me and the kids. The doors are locked. There's no one else in the bloomin house.

"I don't see him," I said, as one who has been subject to **** like this all her life WOULD say to her kid - in a very calm, matter-of-fact, shocked-and-terrified, way.

"That's okay mum. I know he wasn't really there."

Aside from the fact that my daughter is brilliant at creating new words and drawing new creatures on paper, her imagination as far as fibbing or making things up verbally goes, is severely lacking. No, she has not reached the milestone yet where she can tell a lie for the hell of it. She has nothing to gain from this.

So, in short. There was a man (tall, wearing red all over, brown hair) in our kitchen. Those are the appearance details I got out of her, until I asked her if she'd seen what colour eyes he had. She shook her head and I kinda lost it then and there. I remember asking her 'was he looking at you, sweetheart?' and her saying 'I don't want to talk about it anymore'.

We ended the conversation with me saying that if she sees him again to tell me right away.

The Problem
These things don't go away. My grandmother sat with this nonsense all her life, my father and some of my aunts dealt with this all their lives (still ARE dealing with it), I have been battling with this all my life. I don't know if it's a curse. I highly doubt it is (curses don't work when you've got Someone striking them the other way). My grandmother and father were never truly religious or spiritual, even if my dad is a Christian now. I was raised Christian, I've always been spiritual, and I've always had this horrible sense of just knowing when I'm not alone. Okay, I'll rephrase that, I'm never alone, but for the most part they're fairly easy to ignore (to the point where I can feign normalcy).
The problem is that it's one of those things passed down generation after generation. You can't escape it. You can deny it, or ignore it, but it doesn't change the fact.

The Issue
I don't feel comfortable sleeping alone downstairs, nor do I feel comfortable letting my children sleep downstairs without me. I don't think I've told my hubby about it because, well honestly I don't think he believes in any paranormal entities - despite having been through some of these things WITH ME. He's a hopeless case to talk to. And chances are he'll try and grill our daughter for more details, and it would be in vain.

But Mum is a different story.
She's here on her own every day. Every day I'll be out for a couple of hours, twice a week I'd be at work for 4.30 hours, which doesn't seem like much, but to me it feels way too long.

I don't trust her here by herself with the things in the house. I'm not going to call it a ghost, or a demon, or anything. I don't know what it is. I'm not labeling it. It's something that's here, but it isn't, all at once.

The issue I'm grappling with is the pros and cons of telling her about it.
If I don't mention it to her, and something happens, I'd blame myself for not warning her.
If I do mention it, she might become overly paranoid and jittery. Then again, she's atheist, so maybe she won't? I mean what would you do if you were in my shoes?

 

[ROCKMAN X]

curses don't work when you've got Someone striking them the other way

Curses don't exist! lol

I have a simple explanation for all this! people see things all the time so your daughter wasn't lying but what she saw was an illusion.

I even have an explanation for your family members seeing the same visions.. its because you've been told that you'll see them so you subconsciously conjure up those visions!

 

[Vergil'sBitch]

The most important question, have you ever seen anything (or seen what your daughter has seen).
Do you think if your mum would tell you if she saw anything?
I suppose you could say, "If anything weird happens, please tell me." But, it may result in her pressing you for information.

I don't know about curses. I do spend a lot of time thinking about 'sins of the father' (everything my dad has done, I'm being punished for).

If I lived in NZ, I'd spend a night at your house to check it out.

Personal experience:
You've read about my diagnosis and stuff on FB. It's not unusual for me to see a cat wondering around the house (I don't mean Tilly). I know it's not really there (which used to upset me). I now accept that it's there.
I must admit, when I'm sat in my room at night (when all the lights are out), I actually feel like I'm being watched.
I've been reading that people on the spectrum can hallucinate, but... I'm not sure... (that's mostly with Aspergers)
Years ago (before the diagnosis), I was put in front of a mental health team because they thought I was 'suffering' from psychosis (when it was Aspergers all along). But that was in my teens.

I'm not telling you to put your daughter in front of a psychiatrist or 'quack', but do keep an eye on her. And tell her to tell you if/when she sees anything (I tell my mum when I see this cat).
Only you know your daughter, I can only guess *hugs*.

 

[Shadow]

Oh, wow. I'm sorry you're in this position, Claire. Considering all our convos in the past, I'm sure you already know my thoughts on the supernatural, but I think VB's right when it comes to how your mum would react. If she's been open to that sort of thing before, maybe you could casually bring it up like it's not really a big deal, but you want her to keep an eye out? *not entirely sure what she's like, so can't really help*

As for the phantasm itself, have you seen anything like him since you've moved into that house? If not, I think asking your daughter to let you know whenever she sees it is about all you can do for the moment. If you have, well...okay, this might sound stupid, but when mum and I lived in SD we used to see these creepy black humanoid shadows in her bedroom every time we went upstairs to take a bath (both rooms shared the landing at the top of the stairs) and mum got even more freaked out by them than I did. She used to tell them that they could stay, but they couldn't show themselves or bother anyone and that seemed to help. Or, at the very least, she felt like it helped.

Sorry if my advice is sucky. Whenever I see weird things they don't even really register to me, anymore, so.... *not very good at helping**hopes the guy in red isn't seen again**wonders if it's new Dante*

 

[Rebel Dynasty]

I've seen and experienced too much weird sh*t to say it isn't real; like anyone else, I've always tried to find some logical explanation behind what I saw, felt, etc. but a fair bit of the time, there isn't a rational explanation. Sure, sometimes you can explain it away as being over-tired, or that movie you watched the other night, or whatever--but there are times you just know, without a shadow of a doubt, that you're not going crazy--that it is, in fact, there.

In your shoes, I honestly don't know what I would do. First, I must ask--has this thing done anything threatening, so far? How long has your daughter been seeing him for? I know you said she told you a few months ago, but have you asked her when she saw him for the first time? Or was that time the first? Any idea how many times it's been since, and what he has been doing? Is he always just standing there, or has he acted in some other manner?

Most importantly--does your daughter (or any of your other kids) feel threatened, or start acting strange, in his presence? Even if the other kids haven't seen him, perhaps they've reacted in some way, unknowingly?

I feel for you, I really do; the feeling of something always being there, watching, can be pretty unnerving. I would bring it up casually to your mom, so as not to alarm her, but to ensure she isn't in the dark, either. I take it she watches the kids while you're out, right? Maybe you can tell her to keep a careful eye on your daughter; say you aren't entirely sure what, but something has been bothering her, lately, and it worries you a bit.

I really wish I could help more. I know we differ in our practices, but you might try burning a blend of sage and sweet grass incense; that's supposed to help dispel negative energies, if that is, indeed, what this thing is.

 

[Innsmouth]

I have suggestion that may come up as strange, but try bringing cat in house. Cats has feeling for abnormal activity and if there is something in your house, it will feel it. And if it will act nervous, panicking or something, you may try to talk to your mum about it.

 

[Dante's Stalker]

Hey guys, so, I haven't seen anything in this house myself, heard a lot of weird stuff but yes that comes down to my psychosis that tends to rear up when I'm emotionally distressed. I haven't talked to my daughter about it again since, as she made it quite clear that she no longer wanted to talk about it.

We are renting and unfortunately the landlord is hardassed about us getting a pet of any sort. I do want to get a cat (or preferably a dog) for safety sake, so I know I'm not hallucinating, but yeah.

So the overall consensus then is to mention it to her, yes?

 

[Rebel Dynasty]

*Nodnod* Yeah, even if only in a vague manner; that way, you've at least put it out there that something strange is going on. Hopefully there's nothing to worry about, though.

 

[Dante's Stalker]

Do a background check on the place & see if you're satisfied with the results.
If pets aren't allowed then invest in cameras (especially cellphone cameras) or a reasonably priced security system.
Also document anything strange as proof.

I've honestly been too scared to try and film or capture any of the stuff on camera. I know it's a general thing people who think they're 'haunted' do, but my gut has always gone into a twist at the thought. Yeah, nah, I don't want it to know that I'm paying attention. That's how things got out of whack with my dad and them.

But background check, I'll do.