LordOfDarkness
The Dark Avenger © †
Okay, some of you may know that a while ago I wrote short DMC stories. I was aiming for them to be a bit funny, and it's just a bit of fun. So here I go, and criticise away.
Devil May Cry: The Reunion
The clock on the small wood-wormed bedside table struck 8am, like Hell-fire was breaking loose in the tiny confined space of Devil May Cry. Dante woke with a yawn, throwing his clothes onto himself, without much care.
There was a much expected knock on the shop door, which was answered by a very grumpy Dante.
"Hello Nero, take a seat over there" Dante said, greeting him into the store.
Nero seated himself, much to Dante's disbelief that he worked out how to use a chair. As Dante left him to himself, he made himself some pancakes. The door knocked again, as to which Nero answered this time.
"Ah, ladies, come inside" Nero said, gesturing for their entrance inside. Everybody was seated accordingly on the sofa, as Dante was still flipping the pancakes.
"So Dante, all ready for the big photo-shoot?" came a quickly fired question from Lady.
The question almost took Dante back, like a large demon had just pushed him, demanding his lunch money.
"No, I won't let you have my lunch money" Dante almost screamed, before he realised his dialogue was actually seeping from the story itself.
The team looked miffed, as Dante's correct answer came shortly afterwards.
"Oh, I wasn't aware we were having our picture taken today" he stated, as if he hadn't been told over the phone those seventeen times the night before.
"Who's going to be there?" he not long added.
"Just the previous DMC bosses, and a few friends" Trish explained, which shook Dante to the core. Much to his fright. he shook so much that a pancake leapt into the air. After jetting skyward to the ceiling, it landed back down to Earth, finding its own way on-top of Nero's head.
"Dante, I know you keep telling me it's only an accident. But in one week, I have had so many pancakes thrown onto me, that I'm beginning to think I'm involved in a competition" said a rather irritated Nero.
"Oh Nero, I wasn't going to spoil the fun. But since you said it like that, I may as well. You've been Pancaked" Dante laughed, as he pointed out several hidden cameras in the shop.
'So that's what he does in his spare time' the ladies thought in unison.
After cleaning up and eating the pancakes after all, they headed for the photo-shoot.
An extremely camp photographer greeted the group, telling them their positions.
"Okay, so Dante, stand next to that demon there" the man commanded.
"I'm sorry, I can't do this. I'm a freaking Frost, okay? F.R.O.S.T. Not frosty, I'm not a snowman. Just Frost, got it?" the agitated demon replied.
"Sorryyyy... Okay, stand next to the iceman, and act like your scared"...
"No, mr freeze, don't actually hit Dante. Wow, geez, it's a goddamn pose, not World War three. Lets have some respect, icecube" the photographer whined, as to which the Frost left, annoyed.
Dante and the gang confirmed the photographer's worst nightmare. The shots weren't going to work. They just wouldn't get the co-operation they all needed.
The entire get together was cancelled, and a disappointed bunch of demon slayers trundled homeward.
"Did anybody notice that Mundus was missing?" Nero asked.
"He phoned in sick. Got a stomach bug" Trish replied.
"I'll let Mundus know his demons didn't keep up the end of the bargain" Dante told the others.
"Argh...Voice-mail..."
"Hello, you've reached me at a bad time. I'm probably busy planning World domination. If you'd like to leave me a message, I'll try and get back to you. Probably going to be busy from now until the end of time though, but it wouldn't hurt to try"
I guess the moral of the story is, you can't trust evil. Not just because they don't keep promises about friendly photo opportunities. Just don't trust them at all.
The End
Hope you enjoyed ^_^
Devil May Cry: The Reunion
The clock on the small wood-wormed bedside table struck 8am, like Hell-fire was breaking loose in the tiny confined space of Devil May Cry. Dante woke with a yawn, throwing his clothes onto himself, without much care.
There was a much expected knock on the shop door, which was answered by a very grumpy Dante.
"Hello Nero, take a seat over there" Dante said, greeting him into the store.
Nero seated himself, much to Dante's disbelief that he worked out how to use a chair. As Dante left him to himself, he made himself some pancakes. The door knocked again, as to which Nero answered this time.
"Ah, ladies, come inside" Nero said, gesturing for their entrance inside. Everybody was seated accordingly on the sofa, as Dante was still flipping the pancakes.
"So Dante, all ready for the big photo-shoot?" came a quickly fired question from Lady.
The question almost took Dante back, like a large demon had just pushed him, demanding his lunch money.
"No, I won't let you have my lunch money" Dante almost screamed, before he realised his dialogue was actually seeping from the story itself.
The team looked miffed, as Dante's correct answer came shortly afterwards.
"Oh, I wasn't aware we were having our picture taken today" he stated, as if he hadn't been told over the phone those seventeen times the night before.
"Who's going to be there?" he not long added.
"Just the previous DMC bosses, and a few friends" Trish explained, which shook Dante to the core. Much to his fright. he shook so much that a pancake leapt into the air. After jetting skyward to the ceiling, it landed back down to Earth, finding its own way on-top of Nero's head.
"Dante, I know you keep telling me it's only an accident. But in one week, I have had so many pancakes thrown onto me, that I'm beginning to think I'm involved in a competition" said a rather irritated Nero.
"Oh Nero, I wasn't going to spoil the fun. But since you said it like that, I may as well. You've been Pancaked" Dante laughed, as he pointed out several hidden cameras in the shop.
'So that's what he does in his spare time' the ladies thought in unison.
After cleaning up and eating the pancakes after all, they headed for the photo-shoot.
An extremely camp photographer greeted the group, telling them their positions.
"Okay, so Dante, stand next to that demon there" the man commanded.
"I'm sorry, I can't do this. I'm a freaking Frost, okay? F.R.O.S.T. Not frosty, I'm not a snowman. Just Frost, got it?" the agitated demon replied.
"Sorryyyy... Okay, stand next to the iceman, and act like your scared"...
"No, mr freeze, don't actually hit Dante. Wow, geez, it's a goddamn pose, not World War three. Lets have some respect, icecube" the photographer whined, as to which the Frost left, annoyed.
Dante and the gang confirmed the photographer's worst nightmare. The shots weren't going to work. They just wouldn't get the co-operation they all needed.
The entire get together was cancelled, and a disappointed bunch of demon slayers trundled homeward.
"Did anybody notice that Mundus was missing?" Nero asked.
"He phoned in sick. Got a stomach bug" Trish replied.
"I'll let Mundus know his demons didn't keep up the end of the bargain" Dante told the others.
"Argh...Voice-mail..."
"Hello, you've reached me at a bad time. I'm probably busy planning World domination. If you'd like to leave me a message, I'll try and get back to you. Probably going to be busy from now until the end of time though, but it wouldn't hurt to try"
I guess the moral of the story is, you can't trust evil. Not just because they don't keep promises about friendly photo opportunities. Just don't trust them at all.
The End
Hope you enjoyed ^_^
