DreadnoughtDT
God of Hyperdeath
Prompt 1: Strawberries
Title: It Just Gets Better and Better...
Dante sighed and looked out his second floor window. Another crappy day, another crappy job. Frosts had invaded a local bar, and he had to clear them out. Lovely. He looked at the sunset, and his stomach growled. He grabbed his shirtless gut and hunched over, his empty stomach protesting it's lack of nourishment. He grabbed his cell phone and called Nero.
"Dammit Dante, what the hell do you want?" He said, obviously annoyed.
"Can you go get me a strawberry sundae?" Dante asked ignorantly.
Nero scoffed. "Hell no, Dante! Get your own damn food!" With that, he hung up.
Dante threw his phone. "Damn you, Nero. I can never rely on that punk kid..." He walked over and picked up the phone again, this time calling Lady. He could hear explosions on the other line when she picked up.
"Dante, I'm in the middle of a job. This better be important." She was obviously not in the mood, but Dante was tired, so he ignored her tone.
"Hey, I'm really hungry. Can you go get me a sundae? A strawberry one?" Dante said.
"Are you insane?!" She asked incredulously. "Get it yourself, you lazy devil!" She hung up after that.
Dante was quite obviously annoyed at this point. He had one person left to call, besides Trish. And her phone was never on anyway. He called Vergil.
Vergil picked up his cell phone and sighed into the line, angry at Dante for calling so late.
"Dante, what do you want?"
"Vergie, what's up?" Dante said with a smirk on his face.
Vergil most definitely wasn't smirking. "Don't call me that." He said, his voice ice cold.
Dante laughed. "Alright, alright. Anyway, can you go get me a strawberry sundae? Please?"
Vergil laughed bitterly. "Why would I do that?"
Dante smiled evilly, even though Vergil couldn't see. "Because you love me."
Vergil laughed again. "Far from the truth, brother. But I'll get your sundae."
Dante was incredulous. "Really?!"
"Of course." Vergil replied. "After all, what are brothers for?" After that, he hung up.
Dante sat up and put his coat on, then went to wait outside. After what seemed like an eternity, Vergil pulled up in his car and got out, a slight smile on his otherwise stone like face.
Dante stood up and smiled. "So, you got my sundae?"
Vergil nodded. "It's in the car." He said, and opened the door. Dante squealed and grabbed it, then took a bite. He swallowed it without even really tasting it, then took another bite, trying to savor it this time. It had a peculiar taste. He spat it out and looked at Vergil with his tongue hanging out.
"What did you put in that sundae?" He asked with a limp tongue.
Vergil merely smiled evilly. "It's not ice cream. It's frozen glue."
Dante ran back inside to wash out his mouth as Vergil sped off into the now night air. He flopped down on his bed and took his coat off, his stomach growling again. He looked disdainfully at his phone and gritted his teeth. Angered, he fell asleep.
When he woke up, he was dead tired. Vergil was standing over him, a vengeful smirk on his face. Dante narrowed his eyes. "What are YOU smirking at?" He said. Or, tried to say. His mouth was glued shut. He made a muffled "mfffffffffffffffffff!" That may have been a scream, but even HE couldn't make it out. It was at this point that Dante noticed Vergil had a video camera as well. Vergil laughed a bit.
"How does it feel to be inferior for once, Dante?" He asked mockingly.
Dante got up and grabbed Vergil's camera, then threw it out the window behind him with an expression that read "oops, I totally didn't mean to do that... Not."
Vergil was in Dante's face in a heartbeat. "I paid twenty five bucks for that." He said icily. Dante just stood there and smiled. Vergil gritted his teeth. "You're obviously enjoying yourself..." He muttered, then gave Dante a nice smack in the face. Dante's head smashed the window, and he lay there, groaning. Vergil laughed bitterly. "Dante, Dante, Dante..." He repeated. "Always so overconfident. That's what you get for breaking my camera, brother." Dante's expression went dry and he rolled his eyes. "Amain mif da speech?" He said, muffled. "Myou minda csuck mat dat."
Vergil's face went stone-like. "Whatever... I think I'm pretty good at speeches." Then he grabbed Dante's cell phone and dangled it out the other window. "Oops." He said as it plummeted to the ground and shattered like glass. "What an accident. How much did that phone cost you?"
Dante's eyes widened and he got up out of the smashed window, forcefully opening his mouth. "First off, you're paying for a new phone. Two hundred dollars for that custom built phone." He punched Vergil, hard. "Second off, you're going to pay for my broken window. That's another three hundred dollars." He punched Vergil again, in the ribs. "Last off..." He said, cornering Vergil. He leaned down and whispered in his ear. "You're getting me a REAL strawberry sundae." Vergil's face went dry. "You're kidding, right? All this trouble for the damn sundae?"
Dante's expression changed to one of delighted evil. "Yeah, because the one you gave me was GLUE." He said, rather darkly. "Go get in your car, and get me a sundae."
Vergil sighed. "Fine, brother. But don't say I don't do anything for you then. AND, you have to polish Yamato for three weeks, once at day, once at night, no matter what kind of stuff may be encrusted to the blade. Be it sand, blood, or viscera."
Dante thought for a while, weighing the possibilities. Finally, he nodded. "Sounds good." Vergil got up and got in his car, then drove off. Dante smirked. "Dude's gonna wait for a while. Place ain't open yet..."
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It was probably the best sundae he'd ever had, he decided, looking back on Vergil's unconscious body, Yamato in his secret hiding place. Dante burped and sighed. "I love it when things work out awesomely..."
Vergil groaned and started to rouse. "Wh... Where am I...?"
THWACK! Dante kicked him in the side of the head. "Nighty night, for the second time, Vergil." He laughed and dragged Vergil out to his car, then sped off and dumped him at his house to make it seem like a dream. Dante laughed quietly. "Like I said... I love it when things work out awesomely."
Title: It Just Gets Better and Better...
Dante sighed and looked out his second floor window. Another crappy day, another crappy job. Frosts had invaded a local bar, and he had to clear them out. Lovely. He looked at the sunset, and his stomach growled. He grabbed his shirtless gut and hunched over, his empty stomach protesting it's lack of nourishment. He grabbed his cell phone and called Nero.
"Dammit Dante, what the hell do you want?" He said, obviously annoyed.
"Can you go get me a strawberry sundae?" Dante asked ignorantly.
Nero scoffed. "Hell no, Dante! Get your own damn food!" With that, he hung up.
Dante threw his phone. "Damn you, Nero. I can never rely on that punk kid..." He walked over and picked up the phone again, this time calling Lady. He could hear explosions on the other line when she picked up.
"Dante, I'm in the middle of a job. This better be important." She was obviously not in the mood, but Dante was tired, so he ignored her tone.
"Hey, I'm really hungry. Can you go get me a sundae? A strawberry one?" Dante said.
"Are you insane?!" She asked incredulously. "Get it yourself, you lazy devil!" She hung up after that.
Dante was quite obviously annoyed at this point. He had one person left to call, besides Trish. And her phone was never on anyway. He called Vergil.
Vergil picked up his cell phone and sighed into the line, angry at Dante for calling so late.
"Dante, what do you want?"
"Vergie, what's up?" Dante said with a smirk on his face.
Vergil most definitely wasn't smirking. "Don't call me that." He said, his voice ice cold.
Dante laughed. "Alright, alright. Anyway, can you go get me a strawberry sundae? Please?"
Vergil laughed bitterly. "Why would I do that?"
Dante smiled evilly, even though Vergil couldn't see. "Because you love me."
Vergil laughed again. "Far from the truth, brother. But I'll get your sundae."
Dante was incredulous. "Really?!"
"Of course." Vergil replied. "After all, what are brothers for?" After that, he hung up.
Dante sat up and put his coat on, then went to wait outside. After what seemed like an eternity, Vergil pulled up in his car and got out, a slight smile on his otherwise stone like face.
Dante stood up and smiled. "So, you got my sundae?"
Vergil nodded. "It's in the car." He said, and opened the door. Dante squealed and grabbed it, then took a bite. He swallowed it without even really tasting it, then took another bite, trying to savor it this time. It had a peculiar taste. He spat it out and looked at Vergil with his tongue hanging out.
"What did you put in that sundae?" He asked with a limp tongue.
Vergil merely smiled evilly. "It's not ice cream. It's frozen glue."
Dante ran back inside to wash out his mouth as Vergil sped off into the now night air. He flopped down on his bed and took his coat off, his stomach growling again. He looked disdainfully at his phone and gritted his teeth. Angered, he fell asleep.
When he woke up, he was dead tired. Vergil was standing over him, a vengeful smirk on his face. Dante narrowed his eyes. "What are YOU smirking at?" He said. Or, tried to say. His mouth was glued shut. He made a muffled "mfffffffffffffffffff!" That may have been a scream, but even HE couldn't make it out. It was at this point that Dante noticed Vergil had a video camera as well. Vergil laughed a bit.
"How does it feel to be inferior for once, Dante?" He asked mockingly.
Dante got up and grabbed Vergil's camera, then threw it out the window behind him with an expression that read "oops, I totally didn't mean to do that... Not."
Vergil was in Dante's face in a heartbeat. "I paid twenty five bucks for that." He said icily. Dante just stood there and smiled. Vergil gritted his teeth. "You're obviously enjoying yourself..." He muttered, then gave Dante a nice smack in the face. Dante's head smashed the window, and he lay there, groaning. Vergil laughed bitterly. "Dante, Dante, Dante..." He repeated. "Always so overconfident. That's what you get for breaking my camera, brother." Dante's expression went dry and he rolled his eyes. "Amain mif da speech?" He said, muffled. "Myou minda csuck mat dat."
Vergil's face went stone-like. "Whatever... I think I'm pretty good at speeches." Then he grabbed Dante's cell phone and dangled it out the other window. "Oops." He said as it plummeted to the ground and shattered like glass. "What an accident. How much did that phone cost you?"
Dante's eyes widened and he got up out of the smashed window, forcefully opening his mouth. "First off, you're paying for a new phone. Two hundred dollars for that custom built phone." He punched Vergil, hard. "Second off, you're going to pay for my broken window. That's another three hundred dollars." He punched Vergil again, in the ribs. "Last off..." He said, cornering Vergil. He leaned down and whispered in his ear. "You're getting me a REAL strawberry sundae." Vergil's face went dry. "You're kidding, right? All this trouble for the damn sundae?"
Dante's expression changed to one of delighted evil. "Yeah, because the one you gave me was GLUE." He said, rather darkly. "Go get in your car, and get me a sundae."
Vergil sighed. "Fine, brother. But don't say I don't do anything for you then. AND, you have to polish Yamato for three weeks, once at day, once at night, no matter what kind of stuff may be encrusted to the blade. Be it sand, blood, or viscera."
Dante thought for a while, weighing the possibilities. Finally, he nodded. "Sounds good." Vergil got up and got in his car, then drove off. Dante smirked. "Dude's gonna wait for a while. Place ain't open yet..."
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It was probably the best sundae he'd ever had, he decided, looking back on Vergil's unconscious body, Yamato in his secret hiding place. Dante burped and sighed. "I love it when things work out awesomely..."
Vergil groaned and started to rouse. "Wh... Where am I...?"
THWACK! Dante kicked him in the side of the head. "Nighty night, for the second time, Vergil." He laughed and dragged Vergil out to his car, then sped off and dumped him at his house to make it seem like a dream. Dante laughed quietly. "Like I said... I love it when things work out awesomely."
